Invenio, ab licentia, servitus

Lokolee

2011-06-02T16:02:00.002-06:00

Hi All,

Check out my latest blog at lokolee.com. It talks about all things related to local businesses and how they can help make your community a better place to live.

Cheers,

Jeremy

insightwriter.com

2008-10-12T16:01:00.001-06:00

So it's finally here. insightwriter.com My new .com site dedicated to the application of knowledge. Please visit and let me know your thoughts, feelings, expectations, general rants, websites of interest, fascinating news, and whatever else comes to mind.

Thank you,

The Insight Writer Himself,

Jeremy

Operation Aperture

2007-01-11T20:58:00.000-07:00

Check it out. www.operationaperture.blogspot.com

My friend Matt just started it up. It is a picture blog. Definitely worth checking out.

Life Update

2007-01-02T21:11:00.000-07:00

Well things have certainly been interesting these last couple of weeks. I broke up with my girlfriend and it is yet to be seen if we will get back together. Even though I was the one that did the breaking up I told her that I would like a second chance to do things right so its up to her now.
School starts back up again soon. I cant wait. Im taking IT management and Applied Managerial Economics online. The last class actually ended better then I thought. I got an A and my teacher gave me a great compliment by saying that I was a "natural" at project management. It warmed the cockles of my heart. lol.
Work has been going ok. The snow storm has everyone behind on their work so we are going to have some tough times catching up these next two weeks. We shall see what happens.
And I am getting more excited about what God has in store for the future. Already I am realizing just how much I have grown in the past year and how much I will grow this year, especially in terms of relationships. As I get older I realize more and more each day just how important the people in my life are, and how short time is. Time is so short and I remind myself of that everyday so I live it to the fullest.
In any case, I am looking forward to doing some more writing. Wintertime is always great for that. So you will see me leaving the myspace world and coming back to my home at blogger. Crazy huh? You know whats even more crazy? Im about to hit 1000 friends on myspace! Insane! Ok, talk to ya'll's laters....

Faith in God

2006-12-20T22:53:00.000-07:00

We make the stupidest of mistakes when we are not focused on God. I made one this past Friday, and have been struggling with my decision ever since. It has actually turned out to be a life changing experience for me. These past few days, and especially today because of the snow, I have plunged into God's word and have started to pray like never before. This has strengthened my relationship with God drastically and I am a changed man because of it.
As Paul said, not that I have acheived it, but I press onward to the mark God has called me too. And like Paul, God has given me huge clarity of purpose. Yes, I had to be blinded and knocked off my high horse, but God has shown up in my life like never before.
He has shown me that I need to be in lock step with Him. He has shown me that even the smallest decisions should be made with God in mind. It always helps to pause for a second, and think about what God is doing here. What is His plan? What is His purpose? Many times it is unclear, but only through much reading of His word and prayer will things begin to make sense.
The future is uncertain, primarily because God has empowered us to make decisions. Decisions that either nail Him to the cross or give Him the glory. What is certain are God's promises. We know and understand His promises by knowing His word and being in constant communion with Him sharing every aspect of our lives, from the smallest to the biggest.
I don't know if we could ever do it fully because of our fallen nature, but the more we give God the control in our lives the better off we are. For who better to deal with our life situations then our Creator, our Father God.
Jesus is our Savior and he has called us to walk with Him. We are more then conquerers with Him by our side, and with Him all things are possible. God continues to call us to Him, and we must answer His call. If we don't answer it we will be left forever wondering what it would have been like to walk by His side all the days of this short life that God has given us. May we all continue to seek His face and begin to know the awesome Presence and Glory of our Lord, the author and perfecter of our faith.

Here we go again...

2006-11-26T09:39:00.000-07:00

What to do? What to do? My job, even though I like it, is already starting to feel uncomfortable for me. Why is that? Because I have to wear a shirt and tie to work everyday and make phone calls most of the day. The best part is getting to interview potential students, half of which don't show up for their appointments. Regardless, I know that it is where God wants me at for the time being.
The harder question is whether getting an MBA is right for me. I was so excited to start school and now I am seriously considering if it is worth it or not. Why you ask? Because I feel like I should be getting more specialized training rather then getting more generalized training that an MBA offers. In fact, I walked into CTU thinking I was going to get a second degree in IT and I walk out having enrolled in an MBA program. Yes, I have been thinking about getting my MBA for awhile, and yes, getting a second bachelors is a "step backward" to some people but I dont care. The sad fact is that I don't feel like I am learning much, and that I am just doing it to get the credential. Is that so bad? In hindsight I would have at least waited till my Tuition Assistance kicks in. Argh. It makes me sick to my stomach to think that I could have saved so much more money if I would have waited, but now that I have "sunk costs" I feel like I need to just get through it and finish.
So yeah. I hate this. I even thought about not doing this class now, project management, and the way its going, I REALLY wish I would not have taken this class. It is a learning experience though. Here is what I have learned. I hate working on teams I do not pick, and I certainly hate working on teams where I have something at stake and everyone is coming to me hoping that I have all the answers. Well I don't! I am in class just like you, and I am learning the same stuff you are learning, sooooooooooooooo, this is YOUR assignment, learn to do it yourself!!!! geez, I should have vented these frustrations awhile ago. My stomach feels sick right now, or maybe its just hunger pangs. I wanna cry. I am VERY ready to just quit and say there is $4000 down the drain for nothing. grrrrr.

Who I am

2006-10-26T19:18:00.000-06:00

I like to sit back and think things through. When I have a good thought I must say it. It must be exact and I choose words carefully to make sure my message gets across. I don't like it when I have to babysit people and hold their hands. Everyone needs at least some level of emotional support, but I am not the one to give it. What I can give is a listening ear. And if not empathy, understanding. If you want a clear, thought out, objective view, I'm probably the best person to give it. If you want someone to calm your fears and make you feel like everything is going to be alright, then I am not your man. What I can do is calm your nerves and help you think through a situation. Emotions can cloud your judgement and I can help minimize the effect emotions have.
I have trouble letting my emotions out. I do feel them, sometimes very strongly, but they are hard to express for me. Music helps me to feel what I am feeling in a stronger way. It helps me feel passionate. I also like to be around positive emotional people because they lift my spirits and help awaken my passion for life. My intense curiosity also helps me to get along in life. So does my ability to focus. I am very able to block everything out of my mind except the essentials. This works both ways because sometimes I do not do so well when I try to listen to people and empathize with them. People are looking for immediate feedback and I do not give it until I have thought it through.
I have a near photographic memory, but my hearing is impaired. I am not sure why. Two of my heroes are Thomas Edison and Beethoven because they both accomplished great things even though they were deaf. Speaking of accomplishments, I am very much the person who needs to accomplish things in this life. I can't seem to just live. I always have to be pushing myself. I can never seem to be satisfied. My hope is that I can find something deep enough to plunge into that will hold me, but I doubt I would settle for it. If those are the right words, I am not sure, but it is true. I am restless.
I sometimes feel like I live in a fog. Nothing seems to matter and I get very nihilistic, but then I emerge from the clouds and everything is blue sky. Then I come back down again and wallow in this mess. I do not believe I have any type of psychological disorder, except perhaps ADD, I just feel like I ride higher highs and lower lows then most people. Life is a crazy adventure for me. Everything about me, my intense curiosity, my need for new things, people, sites, and sounds, my ability to focus, my restraint, and my fervor, all come together to create a life that pushes all boundaries. I can not stop, I can not rest. I wish I could. I long to find satisfaction, but like the song says...

Oh, the troubles I've seen...

2006-10-25T07:58:00.000-06:00

You know, just when you think it can't get worse, it does. I feel like Job. Actually Im sure my roomate feels more like Job then I do, but thats another story. Last week we had to take the dogs to the emergency vet because they ate some poison and the bill came to $521.00. Wow. Then the next day I thought I was breaking up with my girlfriend. So I got a haircut and baked a cheesecake and everything got better. Right? Wrong! Monday night I was back with my girlfriend, who happened to notice a bulge in our hardwood floor. I went downstairs to see what the problem was and it turned out that a hot water line had busted, and water was spraying all over the wood floor and running down underneath our foundation. AHHH! We have someone coming out to inspect the damages tomorrow, but in the meantime we have no hot water. I just heated some water on the stove so I could get a shave in. lol. Back to the stone age. Not really. At least we have electricity so I can use my computer to write this to you. Anyhow, its off to work for me. I'll give you the update later. In the meantime, I just keep praising the Lord as much as my little soul can. Peace!

Am I crazy, or are they?

2006-10-22T12:46:00.000-06:00

So I have been an admissions advisor for almost 3 weeks now. IT is truly a great job that combines my skills with my passions. But of course, there is still something missing. As great as a job as it is I know I can't stop here. There is more. But the good thing is that I can work my butt off at this job and feel a great sense of satisfaction.
Hardly anything satisfies this soul. I have started my MBA and I am enjoying being back in class immensely. The funny thing is that I already know I will not stop there. I will eventually go on to get my Doctorate degree. I just know it.
Last but not least, I am totally confused about relationships. The romantic ones. I don't really understand how someone can date for 4 years and not get married. Where is the commitment. Why be in it that long if its not meant to be? Im the kind of person that would rather find out sooner rather then later. How can a relationship be that good yet still not good enough to commit to it another 4 years, and possibly another 44 years. Maybe the thought that being married to someone longer then we have been alive thus far is too scary for anyone to take in and therefore they don't get married. When I see that I begin to realize why in America half the population is divorced. Ouch! It hurts. I never want that. But what brings it about? Am I clueless, am I crazy, or am I actually right in my beliefs??? I am struggling to maintain and make better my own relationship right now, and I feel clueless as to how to make it better. Guess maybe, it takes two to tango. ;-)

Mom's Devotion

2006-09-28T14:56:00.000-06:00

So my mom emails me these devotions see...? This one was pretty good so here it is reposted. Enjoy!

Grow in the Grace and Knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 3:18

Jesus is constantly stretching me. You, too? Of course, you, too! And it’s enough to make you sometimes wonder what kind of bargain you got when you gave your life over to this Man. He is so convinced of His capacity to make us people of large purpose, genuine significance, and high destiny that He keeps on leading us forward.
E.M. Bounds had words for it when he often used the expression, “We must always be on the Stretch for God.” It’s not a rack of torture, but it certainly is a path of growth.
But whatever the demand there are resources, because Jesus is here…right now. When this sheep named Jack is accompanied by His Great Shepherd, the whole meadow lights up.

Moments With Majesty

Finally

2006-09-27T09:14:00.000-06:00

Have you ever just gone on and on and wondered when will I get there, when will it end? I have been searching and wondering what God has in store for me and I feel like I am finally emerging from the desert to start anew. Yes, I got the job. Ill be an admissions advisor at Colorado Technical University next week, and I will also be starting my first master's level class Creative Leadership.
I honestly have been just holding on to hope. I kept plugging away with different sales and management jobs knowing that it was preparing me for something. I knew this was what God was drawing me too, but I was never clear on why He took me this direction when I could have went that direction. Even in hindsight a lot is left unclear, but I continue to trust in God to provide and show me His way. He is ever more faithful to me then I am to Him, but I try to grow in faith more and more each day. Faith like a mustard seed, right?
Thank you God for your Mercy and for your Providence. I am so excited to see what You have for me because I know You are leading me to the joy that You have already put into my heart. Amen!

The suspense is....

2006-09-25T21:55:00.000-06:00

I did my last interview today and I believe it went extremely well. I have so many emotions invested into getting this job that I don't know what I will do if I don't get it. I have faith in God that this is the way I am meant to go, but I guess my faith doesn't reach to 100% like I wish it was. I still have my lingering doubts. It reinforces the notion that faith in the power of God has more to do with Gods will then what our earthly logic and reasoning allows us to believe. Really, its not logical that I get this job. Its not logical that I happened to be in the right place at the right time. Its not logical that all my needs will be provided for in abundance. And to whom much is given much wil be expected. I will have that much more of an ability to give back the gifts which God has given me for His loving service.
As always, I read articles wherever and I stumbled across a good one that I took this quote from. "Finding your personal mission starts by identifying the need to which you are repeatedly drawn, the societal problem you most want to see fixed, the human sorrow your gifts might help relieve. Your life's irreducible purpose is found at the intersection of your specific gifts and the needs your life's work will address." Answering that question is something we all need to do. We can't just live our lives on a whim. We need purpose, we need to follow the passion that God has instilled in our hearts. I think one of my biggest missions is to help people find the passion God has instilled in their hearts. And encourage them to let it out. I really don't know exactly what capacity I will do it in, but I know that I have been doing it when I feel Gods leading in my life. I know I have helped encourage alot of people to follow their passions and I pray I will continue to have a greater capactiy to do so again in the future.
All in all, I am still searching for the exact purpose God has for me in His will, but I see the pieces coming together so beautifully that I cant deny the workings of God in my life. Its can be scary though. Its like that trust exercise where you close your eyes and fall backward hoping that the people behind you will catch you and you will be safe. It takes trust. And I have to admit that I haven't put my 100% trust in Him. I have let my fears get the best of me. But as for this job, I am all in. Once again, I honestly dont know what I will do if I dont get this job because everything in my life seems to have been leading up to this point. Im so excited to get started. Its not easy, but Im trying to lean wholly on God and not on my own understanding. Ah, that one verse makes me rest easy because I know God has me in His hand.
Anyhow, time to get some sleep and get some painting done tomorrow. ;-)

Grad School

2006-09-23T10:04:00.000-06:00

So I finally did. I applied, got financial aid, got enrolled, and I start classes in October at Colorado Technical University to get my MBA. Im so excited. I cant wait. And the best thing? Im in the interview process to work there as an admissions advisor. How cool is that? Get to work at the school Im attending and help other people go as well. How sweet is that? Can you tell Im excited? AHHHHHHH!
Ok, Ill give you the update later...

Ahhh Life

2006-09-21T21:07:00.000-06:00

So I had a job offer in hand. Pretty sweet deal paying more then I have ever been paid before. And then I give it up for an uncertain potential job that I still have one more interview for that I might not get, and be stuck with what I got now, which isnt much in the way of the job department. Ahhh, time to have faith in God and know that no matter what His will is being accomplished in my life. Here is some good stuff on that...

THE WILL OF GOD

It is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure. Philippians 2:13

So many people sit in my office and moan, “Oh, if only I could find the will of God for my life!”

Yet the will of God is found in your own heart.

You can get good counsel, read helpful books, and diagram your life on the kitchen table, but ultimately, the answer is in your heart. And when your heart is totally committed to follow Christ and walk in His ways, you can’t miss the will of God. He’ll get you there one way or another. Yes, the route may be roundabout. It may include a climb over some jagged mountains and dip down through some dry, rocky valleys. But God, who knows both the beginning and the end of your days will get you there!

A New Time and Place: Preparing Yourself to Receive God’s Best (Sisters, Oregon: Multnomah Publishing House, 1997)

As always, may Gods will be done in my life. Amen!

Personal Emails & Calls at Work

2006-09-12T09:31:00.000-06:00

Wow, the statistics are true. Most people really do "waste" a lot of company time on personal things at work. Case in point... So Im getting rid of an air hockey table on craigslist for free. So far Ive gotten about 50 plus emails of people interested in it. And it hasn't even been a 24 hour time period since Ive posted it!
Anyhow, Im just reading some of these emails for amusement since Ive already told one guy he can have it, and soooo many of them are emailing from work. Since they are emailing from work they must also be surfing the web at work. Looking at craigslist and who knows what else. Gosh! The internet is amazing. People are amazing. Ah, thats just my story for today. Now go back to work you slackers!!! j/k ;-)

Crikey!!!

2006-09-04T13:37:00.000-06:00

Its a sad day on Earth when one of our most beloved dies. Steve Irwin, otherwise known as the Crocodile Hunter died today from the barb of a stingray off the northeast coast of Australia in the Great Barrier Reef. This is one of the most dangerous yet most beautiful places to dive, and its most infamous character is the great white shark.
If I was Steve Irwin then I would be happy knowing that I left this Earth doing what I loved to do best. Hopefully we can all live in such a way, and I am sure his only regret would be that he left alot undone. Steve we will miss you dearly.
News sure travels fast with the internet and tv and everything. I happened to hear about it first from my sisters when I called home to say hi to the family. Courtney and Bre are going to make a movie to commemorate Steve's life. Im looking forward to seeing it. Then Jason told me he had seen it on CNN this morning. Then I got a myspace bulletin about it. And here I pass it on Blogger. One can only hope to live a similar life in whatever ones calling happens to be, and do it big time like Steve did. Steve made the world a better place, even if just a little bit, for all of us. Hopefully more and more people will learn to find and live out their passions to the fullest like he did in his lifetime, and make the world a better place, even if its just a little bit.

Ideas

2006-09-02T21:08:00.000-06:00

Ideas are what make the world go round. Ideas are what new businesses are formed on and what drives the economy. So I give an idea that I came up with talking to my friend Roger at lunch today. Here it is.
Everyone who knows anything about alternative energy resources knows that in many places if you have your own solar and/or wind energy you can use that energy in your home and sell back excess energy to the power companies and even make money. Problem is, most people will never invest in them anytime soon. Why?
One, its just not the thing to do...yet. Come on now. Who do you know has solar panels on their roof? Thats what I thought. Heck, I live in Colorado not too far from Boulder and I dont personally know anyone with solar panels on their roof. And Colorado is one of the sunniest places in the US.
Two, the big up front cost. Yep, gas is still "cheap" enough that we keep using it to heat water and our houses. In the winter time I "only" pay a maximum of $300 per month to use it. And we usually keep our house at a toasty 65 degrees!
So, here is my proposal. We need someone to form a company that will install, for free, solar panel systems in people's houses, charge them a rate about half of what the gas and electric companies charge, and sell any extra energy back to the power grid. Is that genius or what?
I haven't really worked out all the financials, but the company should recoop its original investment in 3 to 5 years (which is longer then most investment firms want to wait), and be making straight profit after that with minimal upkeep. The best thing for a business wouldn't be the immediate R.O.I. The biggest thing is building an infrastructure bigger then energy companies over time, and continue to have new business and rising profits as energy prices continue to rise. Talk about stability and potential future profits would be enormous. The energy companies would be forced to change their ways or die.
You dont think it could happen? Believe me, something a lot like it is coming where good business practices and ideas continue to help the community more then the government ever could. Give me your thoughts...

p.s. I have to think about Jasons comment in my previous post and post something about it later down the line.

Inflation

2006-09-01T20:47:00.000-06:00

As some of you may know the Feds have consistently raised interest rates for the past couple of meetings they have had until this most recent one. Finally, a breather from rising interest rates to stem off inflation. It got me thinking. What exactly does inflation look like and what is causing it? Costs of goods and services continue to get higher for a few reasons. Rising labor costs and rising energy costs are the big culprits. What keeps inflation in check normally? Innovation and increased productivity. We have reached heights in productivity that we could have only imagined 100 years ago. Im sure we will continue to find ways to be more productive but only in certain areas. We are very efficient and will continue to be so. "Offshoring" seems to be the current option to increase producitivty on a per dollar basis. If we can get someone in another country to produce something that an American will produce at double the labor costs, dollar for dollar, most companies will be better off even if they have to ship things further rather then produce things where they are consumed. Ultimately, this will prove to be unsustainable and its one of the major reasons energy costs continue to rise. A serious compounding factor.
I forsee a political battle over energy issues very soon because it really has to do with the mighty dollar and how we live. Energy will soon supercede all other issues politically and I am curious to see how this next presidential election plays out. I seriously smell a Democratic victory.
But I digress. Simple as it is I have some ideas to help make a more sustainable economy that keeps inflation in check. One issue. Currently, VC firms and Banks are sitting on vast amounts of money they don't know what to do with. Why? Because they cant find enough good ideas to invest in. The world still lacks enough entreprenuers to successfully sustain innovation at a rate fast enough to sustain the economy. Crazy notion, no? Why again? People can't be educated fast enough. Dumping alot of that money back into the economy in a form that adds value would help deflate, but thats just it. It doesnt have an avenue to flow.
And thats my biggest economic theory that I adhere too. That once the money stops moving and being useful we get stagnation. The biggest fear right now is the fear of an economic term called stagflation. Increased inflation with little to no growth in the economy. Basically this means that for every dollar you earn today you have less you can actually buy with it, therefore, you purchasing power is decreased. In essence, you are now getting paid 95 cents for what you were previously paid a dollar to do. And the other bad thing? As if that wasnt bad enough... is that the government cant control them both directly at the same time. It can only stimulate growth or reign in inflation. More and more the ropes that tie the two together are coming apart as it matters less and less what interest rates are set at. Money will flow where it will when it will.
Of course, all this is at the aggregate level and in theory. On an individual basis, some people barely notice and some people are greatly affected. Whats my point? To a certain degree these things are uncontrollable and we are all just going along for the ride. Yet, some things are controllable. Using strategic intiatives we can combat these issues head on and subdue this world even further. I feel like we have already put the bridle on the horse, now we just need to keep practicing the riding part and we will do just fine. ;-)
Side note: about the MBA. I just love business in general so Im not sure if I will go after accounting or not. We shall see, as always. Finance continues to interest me because Im so interested in the startup phases of any business. Its where a lot of the action is at too. Anyhow, off to ponder my thoughts further...

Grad School

2006-08-27T20:49:00.000-06:00

So I've been thinking hard about it and I think my best choice for graduate school is going to be an MBA. I've thought further about and after talking with a friend who is an Actuary, and doing some further research Im going to concentrate on Accounting and be a CPA and/or an Actuary. Being a CPA is a perfect business for me because I can be involved in multiple businesses at the same time. Or if I work for a bigger corporation I can deal with all the various departments. Someone also once said its the CFO that really controls the corporation, not the CEO. Not sure if thats always true, but I imagine it can be in many situations.
So those are my thoughts for now. Im hoping to get this job working as an insurance agent. It would be the perfect way to make enough money to go to grad school. As always, we shall see....

p.s. Ill leave you with this quote I read from a comment on a business week article:

This is a truism.

Undergraduate: drinking, screwing, sleeping late, missing half my classes, cramming like hell and still getting a B-

Graduate: working my a$$ off, missing most nights and weekends, poor (because it's my own money), and learning more in one year than all my undergrad, high school, etc. combined.

Happy Birthday to ME!

2006-08-19T08:38:00.000-06:00

Yes, today is my birthday. And I am glad to be alive! I don't know why, but birthdays have always been my funnest times. A time to gather all my friends to me in one bunch. Anything is an excuse for a party is my motto. Right now, my parents are here. We need to go get a rental car because we are headed up to Estes Park tomorrow. I cant wait. Its been a bit rainy, but hopefully that won't damper our plans.
So my thoughts on entering the second half of my 20's? Nothing much really. Still my biggest concern is my career and whether or not I should go get an advanced degree. As always, we shall see.
I would say the most important thing that I have discovered is that I can do nothing better then continue to improve my relationship with God my Father. Then all other things fall into place. I'll leave you with a devotional for you to ponder. Enjoy!

Through love serve one another. Galatians 5:13

To think of the biblical term harvest is to think of people helping people, touching people, loving people, serving people and winning people into the love of God. On the other hand, to misplace or lose our perspective on the harvest-----------on serving people with life-----is the surest way to short-circuit the promised possibilities of our own lives.

I’ve found a common element in every individual who grows bitter, misses fulfillment, becomes sour, complains about God, falls into self-pity, or wonders “why nothing ever happens to me.” That common denominator is a lost sense of ministry…..of serving, loving, helping, and reaching others in the Savior’s name.

Ideas Flow Again! Im so excited.

2006-08-17T12:17:00.001-06:00

I dont know what has happened but I think Ive gotten back to being in an environment or a state of mind that allows my ideas to flow freely again. Like I had a big blockage going or something. Im so happy.
Sad thing is I havent been writing them all down so now I begin.
entreprenuer stories.
I want to write a book on the stories of entreprenuer's by interviewing them, their families, and associates, and put it all together to form an inspiring book of people who took the leap into starting their own business. I sat down with the owner of this school photography business Im going to get into and he told me most of his story over lunch about being fired, and taking what he knew, and making it into a business, when everyone else in his company started looking for another job. He emphasized the need to keep your eyes focused on the long term goal while making sure short term goals get met, but not allowing the short term losses affect the long term win. Oh, how I love entreprenuer's. Hey, you gotta love what you do, right?
Another idea of ming is sparked by reading this article of Nemko's. http://www.martynemko.com/pub/articles/Nemko'srules.shtm
In it he talks about Career Contentment and how it can be found by going against what the crowd does and getting into an industry that isnt so "glamourous" or competitive. Its a good read. But the main part that stirred my imagination is the part where he suggests people move out of the Bay Area. huh? Move away from San Fran? You got to be kidding right? Its the best city around. Well, its also highly competitive and if you are willing to look around you will find a career where you are treated better, both personally and financially, because, though it may not have tons of people waiting for a job opening, it will be able to meet your requirements and the 8 specific attributes of job satisfaction Nemko lays out in his article. Happy reading.
But to my idea. Pittsburgh. Diamond in the rough is how I like to think of it. Because of its healthcare system it is poised for some serious growth in the next decade as boomers continue to need advanced healthcare and end up flocking to the area to retire. Yes, more old people in Pittsburgh, just what Pittsburgh needs right? Well actually yes. It will pump billions of dollars into the local industry allowing them to relieve debt, keep taxes continually low on average, and help to create an infrastructure that will continue to create new jobs. It really is just a matter of time and anyone that invests in the city now will reap rewards in the future. At least, that how I see it. ;-)
So those are my ideas for now. Ill continue to write more down, hopefully. Until then, May God be with you.

Why don't I listen>?

2006-08-15T13:56:00.000-06:00

Teach me Your way, O LORD; I will walk in Your truth. Psalm 86:11

Constancy to God’s Word brings success in life------the success born of obedience. Faith is not so much the power to acquire or to bring something into my life, as it is the power to obey God’s plan for my life. To walk by faith is to stay on God’s ordered paths, which naturally lead to the things He has planned -----things that will fulfill us and make us fruitful servants.

Faith isn’t an effort to acquire things by bursts of spiritual energy. It is simply staying on track in the pathway God’s Word has ordained. Faith isn’t a ritual of speech as much as a response in obedience. God’s promises are already there in the path of His will for your life. Faith simply walks forward, moving in His way.

So goes the devotional my mom sent me in today's email. I seriously think she should just start her own newsletter. lol. Anyhow, I can't believe how much I feel like I need to keep myself occupied so that I don't take that quiet time to really listen to God and read His Word. So now I go to do it. Thats all!

Backpacking & Other Things

2006-08-12T15:38:00.000-06:00

Ahhhh, a week in the great outdoors. Wonders upon wonders. I love it! A chance to be in Gods glorious creation. Hardly anything takes my breath away but there was one moment on my trip that simply took my breath away. And many other moments where I just realized how great it is to be alive. I didnt want to come back. But here I am, back and ready to get back to work. Or at least trying to be ready to be back to work.
hmmm, work. I dont even know where to begin. its the most confusing area of my life right now. i want to get into the whole school photography thing but it still doesnt allow me to be fulltime. but, i have the offer in hand to be a photographer for this next school year at a pretty decent hourly pay. its just that I need to continue painting for at least another year. Hang in there, is what I keep telling myself. and I continue to think about getting into something more oriented to what I really love doing which is working with teens. I dont know. Its frustrating me to no end right now.
Things have been going great with kelli and I recently. We have been dating for almost 4 months. Thats pretty significant for me, but oh how the time flies. Im trying to savor each moment as much as I can, yet they slip into memories ever so quickly. I just thank God that I have her in my life each and every day.
Last but not least, my parents are coming to visit next weekend. Im so excited to have them coming out. They came out last year too and we had a great time together. We are going up to Estes Park again this year which should be fun.
Im in such a weird mood right now. Like simultaneously happy and sad. its very hard to explain. As always, we shall see.

~jeremy

Ahhh, Success?

2006-07-02T12:45:00.000-06:00

Success. What does it mean? I put in my two weeks at Abercrombie last Thursday. Does the fact that I quit jobs make me unsuccessful? Guess it depends on what you are trying to accomplish. I feel like if I am ever going to start my own business its gotta be now or never. Im going back to Mcguyver Painting. I will go back to the original plan of being the first franchise owner and continue on in franchise development. I will also pursue other business opportunities on the side.
I also want to become more involved in ministry. I feel like its time to take the next step. I went camping this weekend with a few folks that have been involved in working with kids in one way or another. 4 of us have been camp counselors. 2 have gone to NOLS. All of us have a passion for being outdoors and living a Christian life. Jenny, who is Clay's girlfriend, suggested I should go to NOLS for their 2 month outdoor educator course. Its like a lightbulb went on in my head. YES! I should do that. Thats what I want to do! haha, its crazy how things like that are inside you all along and it takes the physical reality of them being put in your face for you to recognize it and take action. hmm, thats a really good truth.
Anyhow, I feel like God is really guiding me and in hindsight I can truly see His will coming to fruition in my life. I will leave you with some quotes by Benjamin Disraeli, the only Jew ever to be elected Prime Minister of England...

This first one is my favorite:
-The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.
-The wisdom of the wise and the experience of the ages are perpetuated by quotations.
-There can be economy only where there is efficiency.
-To be conscious that you are ignorant of the facts is a great step to knowledge.
-We are all born for love. It is the principle of existence, and its only end.
-Be amusing: never tell unkind stories; above all, never tell long ones.
-Great countries are those that produce great people. (I will continue to say, Great companies also are those that produce great people.)

The rest are on success:
-As a general rule, the most successful man in life is the man who has the best information.
-One secret of success in life is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes.
-Success is the child of audacity. (audacious=bold or arrogant disregard of normal restraints, marked by orginality, boldness characterized by resolute fearlessness, fortitude, and endurance.)
-The secret of success is constancy to purpose.
-Through perseverance many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure.

Last Words...

2006-06-25T00:03:00.000-06:00

So I have to remind myself about this book called The Likeability factor by Tim Sanders. Awesome book. I read it in B&N the other day. two hours and i devoured it! It talks about how being a likeable person gets you ahead in life. If people like you, you are more likely to make the sell, get promoted, have good health. etc., etc., etc.
Here is a relevant link on the subject.
http://www.itworld.com/Career/4198/050426finishlast/
Its worth reading. Anyhow, Im off to bed to ponder these things in my dreams. Read it!

A job, a career, a business...

2006-06-24T23:07:00.000-06:00

So I don't know what to say except that I feel truly unemployable. I don't think I'm ever going to have a job again and I can't really explain why. I am just so dang independent that I gotta operate on my own terms and that is probably going to mean me starting my own business.
In the mean time I have my options. I have Mcguyver Painting to go back to. 100% commission here I come. I love it! I can easily make more there then at Abercrombie & Fitch anyhow. Jason, how long was it that you said I would last at this job? haha. I got job A.D.D.!
I like being to work 12 hours a day when I choose or 4 hours a day if I choose. I love the flexibility. 2 weeks vacation! ha, i laugh in your face big corporate man. haha. yeah, I feel like the music at Abercrombie which is repeated over every 2.5 hours is driving me to the brink of insanity. Not to mention, figuring out ways to motivate kids that are paid 6 bucks an hour and are supported by mommy and daddy. How the heck you get someone like that to work at all I dont know...
Anyhow, Im just venting. Dont take any of this seriously. Im just writing because its my therapy. More updates later...
Laters....

Oh boy!

2006-05-26T23:23:00.000-06:00

And girl. Yep, I started working at Abercrombie Kids today. Yes, they have a kids store. haha, gotta love it. The store manager just started at this particular store 2 weeks ago and the other 2 managers quit in the past week. So I told Abby, my DM, that I want to be the go to man for any distressed stores, and a week later, I get my chance. God I love being in the right place at the right time. And it helps that I got to know Jeff, the DM for Abercrombie. He requested me permanantly but I guess its up to Abby if she really wants to let me go.
Anyhow, I jumped right in and got a lot accomplished today. Its a good feeling. I just love the challenge of it all. If they could keep me moving that would be awesome! I figure most people would hate going into a distressed store but I love it. The store as of right now, looks like crap, its totally disorganized, its dirty, and we are totally understaffed. Its great! ;-) Im borrowing some of my people from Hollister to come help out. I just really love the newness of it all. And did I mention the challenge? ;-)
So I came home and lo and behold Walk the Line came from netflix. How I love Netflix, let me count the ways! That was an awesome movie. I think Im going to buy it. It is definitely on my top 10 all time best movies list now. Yep, its that good. I dont think any movie will beat Braveheart anytime soon though. Alright, its time for bed. Goodnight!

Will I ever figure it out?

2006-05-13T09:52:00.000-06:00

Why is it that I can never find the right work place for me? I want to write bad things about people I work with but after that woman got fired from her work after she posted some stuff about her boss, I'm not about to do the same thing. I've always needed a boss that I can respect and that is competent at what they do and they treat me more like an equal team player. Thats how I treat everyone I have ever been a boss over. Am I really asking too much? And I cant deal with incompetence. I hate people in power who are incompetent at what they do. How did they get there in the first place. Oh, its just frustrating.
So once again, I am considering my options for a career. Will it ever end? Sometimes I wonder if it is really me. Is it possible for me to be more satisfied with my work? Why cant I settle down? I don't want to be labeled a job hopper, but that's what I am becoming. I took a month to find this job and I thought after careful consideration I would be able to make a career out of it. And I still can, but I get so dissatisfied so quickly. And I cant seem to figure out why. Or maybe I just am ignorant of what I really want in a career. I know it certainly doesnt include incompetent management. Thats why I want to own my own business so much. Its so I can call the shots. Of course, I dont want 100% of the responsibility that comes with owning a business. Am I in a catch 22?
I feel like sooner or later Im just going to have to overcome some things. I have so much to do today. I gotta handle some personal stuff, take care of some painting business, then go to work from 1pm to 11pm. Its too much. And the funny thing is that I can jump back into the painting business at anytime and make more money there then at Hollister. I just gotta suck it up and put in the hard work there. Its something to pray about for sure.
As always, may Gods will be done. amen.

Deal Makers & Breakers

2006-04-24T22:09:00.000-06:00

Well some sad events have transpired at Hollister. I didnt get the chance to work on the rehab team as expected. Im not too down about it. There will be other chances, but it is a bit disappointing. And Michelle is getting promoted to Chicago. Its sad to see her go because she so went to bat for us. So the future is a little uncertain but as always, we shall see.
So onto the subject for tonight. Lately, in our dating escapdes Tom and I have been talking alot about deal breakers. Things that would stop a blossoming relationship dead in its tracks. Neither one of us are afraid to say a major deal breaker would be atheism. We both believe in God strongly and we talked alot tonight about how He has His hands in our lives.
But the thing Tom said tonight was that this girl he has been dating said she has no deal breakers, only deal makers. I thought it was an interesting concept so I just had to talk about it on here. One of this girls deal makers is the ability to converse at length about worthwhile topics and be able to maintain it without being fake. Wow, I didnt think to put it that way exactly but I think thats huge. Im still going to have deal breakers, but Im also going to start establishing some deal makers. Maybe Ill have more on the subject later. For now, its time for my beauty rest. ;-)

10 Life Goals

2006-04-23T22:39:00.000-06:00

I shall limit my goals to my top 10. Here we go!

1. To inspire people to greatness (Vague and ongoing, but I can break it down into the parts I do to attain this goal everyday)
2. To have a loving wife and kids, and an altogether wholesome family.
3. To have fulfilling life work.
4. To be able to do something very worthwhile for myself and my community.
5. To make a contribution to society in the form of a written work.
6. To learn as much as possible, and never stop learning.
7. To experience as much of life as possible.
8. To find true freedom.
9. To be financially independent and start my own business.
10. To be the man God wants me to be.

Maybe you can consider these my priorities rather then my life goals. Either way, this is what I live by. And Jason, only by compressing my plethora of goals down into these neat packages can I include them all. ;-) Enjoy!

Update

2006-04-17T23:31:00.000-06:00

So I went and talked with Suzanne today up at Abercrombie. She is the lead person on the rehab team and it looks like I will get to help out after all. Jeff the DM of Abercrombie seems like he is willing to work things out with Michelle for me. We have a managers meeting in the morning so I will know more then probably.
And I bought a new ultimate frisbee. I cant wait to play. Im in the process of writing a new song as well. I realized its been more then a year since i have written something so I need to get cracking.
And I think I will be going out dating again soon. This will be the first time since January. Ive been so jaded for the longest time, but I have a good feeling about this one. Ive taken the time to get to know her better BEFORE we even go out unlike some of the past girls I have dated. So here is to good times, and high hopes. ;-)

Life is Good@!

2006-04-16T02:00:00.000-06:00

So yeah, I like my job. Alot. Hopefully this will last a long time. But so far so good. It seems like a great company to stick with in the long run. My Store Manager Felicia just got promoted to DM. Congrats to her. She is moving to Portland. Im excited for her. And one of the assistant managers is going to be a store manager in Seattle. How cool is that? I mainly got in with this company to do some traveling and I am excited to really get into this company and learn everything.
Im looking to go onto what they call the "rehab" team. Basically they are the people who go into distressed stores and bring them back up to speed and also open all the new stores. We are opening stores in london and tokyo in the next couple of years and probably many more int'l ones after that. Hopefully I can play a big part in it.
Anyhow, its Easter morning. Time to go to bed so I can wake up again in a few hours. Peace!

I love it, the Grammar Nazi!

2006-04-02T12:31:00.000-06:00

I was just reading some posts on the entp.org forums and found this picture. I just had to post it. haha. it fits me pretty well. once an editor, always an editor. ;-)

I did it!

2006-03-31T20:34:00.000-07:00

I accepted a position as a manager in training @ Hollister. I dont know what to say except that I felt like I needed to try it out. Some people say I wont last long, as usual. Im not placing any bets on myself either. Im still going to be pursuing some things on the side like I always do. Feel free to ask questions.
On another note, I feel like this past month of not working has been very cleansing. Its hard to explain, but Im sure sometimes you just feel like you are in a fog wondering around and then everything starts to become clear and make sense. I guess for the most part it is just getting a better grasp on reality and not letting go.
Amen.

Where have I been?

2006-02-26T12:26:00.000-07:00

Gosh, I almost didnt remember how to log in and make a post anymore. Things have been busy. Im about to make a move to leave my current employment. I have one job offer on the table and a few other interviews lined up. My manager got fired about two weeks ago. He was there for about a year and he wasn't hitting his numbers. Its a shame. I really saw him as a mentor.
Anyway, it has prompted me to look elsewhere and so many interesting things have come up. Job opportunities, business opportunities. You name it. Man, America is great. Its like the Bible says, ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock, and the door will be opened to you. The future is looking bright right now.
Tom is still in bed now. He is working midnight shift, he got me all excited to go to Glenwood today and he isnt getting his bum out of bed. gosh!
And spring is in the air. I told Tim we need to go skiing at least once before the season is over. We shall see. ok, time to really get Tom out of bed.
hasta la pasta.

Griping

2006-01-24T20:37:00.000-07:00

So I went to the store today and they no longer have the razor blades I need for my razor. grrr. I bought a whole new razor and a bunch of replacement blades. Its sad that things always need to be new. Why cant we stick with the old? Do only the old want to stick with the old? Am I getting that old?
Why the need to upgrade. I feel like we Americans always have to have something new just to please our desires and make us feel like we are doing something or accomplishing something. Its almost too easy to just survive in American so we feel the need to always have and do more, and cant be satisfied with what we have and do now. Its always a thin line, because u want to strive for more. Its how we grow. But the direction we have taken it in seems to be wrong.
And I love technology, but I was thinking. Man, technology... has it really done much for us, or just made our lives more complicated? perhaps, its finally coming full circle and being perfected. then again, who knows what the future holds.
Im just trying to simplify my life and really home in on the important things. and now Im rambling.
Go Steelers! haha. We are going to win the Superbowl this year. Seahawks dont have anything against us. Yeah, so goodnight. till next time.

Here we go again

2006-01-14T16:21:00.000-07:00

Yeah, so Im settling into my job now. Go figure. You guys thought Id never say that, but I can honestly see myself doing this for awhile. Granted, I still have a lot of other things I wanna do, but I want to turn my ambition away from always looking for a better job or opportunity to really working on myself and my relationships with people.
Im going out on a date tonight. Im not too excited, but Ive gotten to know this girl and she is pretty much on the same wavelength as me which is good. She is going to get her masters in int'l policy which I think is pretty cool. Of course, in every other way we are total opposites. Maybe Ill say more about her later.
My Space has been more addictive then Blogger ever was and its getting really big. It was hard to convince people to join blogger and write about there lives, but people have no problem posting pictures, and comments, and everything else on My Space. Guess they passed up Google in the number of hits they get a month which is incredible cause Google is my home page. lol.
And Ive been helping out with the youth group a lot more lately. We had a worship set after this show with Three Cord Wonder and Regardless, two local Christian bands. it was awesome. and I showed up on a Thursday night for once. Basically Rob out worship leader is leaving very soon and we are looking for a new high school pastor. Its going to be interesting the next few months. And I gotta step it up with worship. I hope they hire someone with some worship ability.
Anyhow, Ill leave you with this. I was talking to my friend Wendy online and she asked me, "Have you been committing any crimes lately?" and I said, "...only stealing girls hearts." ;-) You gotta understand the relationship we have to really get it but I thought it was funny. Take Care...

Happy New Years!!!!!!!

2006-01-01T11:30:00.000-07:00

Well its 2006 and we are all getting older. haha. You know, I wish I could have recordings of all the wonderful conversations Ive had over the years. Last night I spent New Years with two of my newest friends, Matt and Diane. It was a mostly uneventful night where everyone else seemed to be having lots of drama. In any case, we all had a good time and the night ended at Matt's house. His parents had some of the neighbors over and one of those neighbors gave us some cigars. Who am I to pass that up?! They were from Honduras, the good kind that last a long time. So we were sitting outside in the brisk air smoking our cigars and just talking about life. And it was wonderful. And everytime this happens to me Im like, "wow, I miss this". I miss college primarily for the reason that most people like to talk about the deeper issues of life. I dont hate small talk but it annoys me sometimes, and I know its mostly the environment that allows you to get into these types of discussions, but all I want to really say is that I miss it.
Ok. So you are wondering what we talked about. Well, Matt is majoring in journalism and is a wonderful writer. And somehow we started talking about John Steinbeck's works and how he was very much a global thinker and how some people have such a limited view of the world. Gosh, I dont want to sound pessimistic though because Im hopeful. I couldn't believe I was actually acting the literary critic when I probably havent read a good piece of literature since college.
Anyhow, it lead to us talking about life and death, and what we are here for, and how we should live our lives, and then I realized why Im so careful with who I spend my time with. Talking about deeper life issues really nourishes my soul, and I really miss it. I really, really do. And I need to start surrounding myself with those types of people again. Even more then I do now.
In any case, my new years resolution is to go back to school. Anyone else have any new years resolutions they want to share?

Envisioning the Future

2005-12-31T08:29:00.000-07:00

Jason, this is for you and any other fans of ghost in a shell. Its an article talking about present day brain-computer interfaces, or as we known them, cyber brains. The article mainly focuses on a guy who is a C4 quadriplegic, paralyzed from the neck down. With the device he has connected to his brain he can control many things with his thoughts alone. Its definitely worth a read.
http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/13.03/brain.html

more personality tests.

2005-12-30T18:52:00.000-07:00

Stability results were high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic..

Orderliness results were moderately low which suggests you are, at times, overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment.

Extraversion results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.

trait snapshot:
messy, disorganized, social, tough, outgoing, rarely worries, self revealing, open, risk taker, likes the unknown, likes large parties, makes friends easily, likes to stand out, likes to make fun of people, reckless, optimistic, positive, strong, does not like to be alone, ambivalent about chaos, abstract, impractical, not good at saving money, fearless, trusting, thrill seeker, not rule conscious, enjoys leadership, strange, loves food, abstract, rarely irritated, anti-authority, attracted to the counter culture
Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test

Conclusions

2005-12-23T19:18:00.000-07:00

I have been doing some thinking lately and I have come to a number of important conclusions in my life. Conclusions that I have either not come to terms with or that I had ignored or simply hadn't decided what I thought was right.
1. I am happy no matter where I am at.
2. I can choose to be happy no matter what I am doing.
3. I desire to be around certain people more then others, and its all right.
4. I must renew myself daily.
5. I am annoyed by people I love dearly.
6. I am dear to many people.
7. I need to focus on the person I am with as if they are the entire world.
8. I am myself and nothing can change that except myself.
9. I must always look out for myself first.
10. I am needed by many people in many different ways.
11. I must give of myself wisely.
12. I realize I may take my last breath by the time I dot this sentence.
13. I have found that love truly does make the world go round.

Why 13? 13 is an incomplete number. If I may add one more as number 14 I would say I realize more and more each day that there is always more to learn. What I dont understand is why people stop. The world is large and I know my desire to know and see it all is much larger than the average person but... I can only speak for myself. Why I also wonder is why no one has really asked me what Invenio, Ab Licentia, Servitus means? The world may never know...

So much to do, so little time.

2005-12-19T19:48:00.000-07:00

I read a great article last night that was actually a commencement speech given by Steve Jobs at Stanford University. Click Here
Im going back to school. Sometimes ur intuition tells you something and u gotta listen. Ive been following my gut feelings alot more recently and it has helped me out a lot.
Anyhow, I fly home in 3 days! yipee! Cant wait. See all you Pennsylvanians soon! Bye...

The Christmas Party!

2005-12-17T10:31:00.000-07:00

Finally something to blog about. haha. My gosh, it was a blast. I drank way too much punch. heh. The gag gifts went over all. It was so cool having a real tree with gifts under it in our new house. ;-) We had a bunch of wonderful people over last night and I got to meet some new and wonderful people. One in particular Id like to spend some more time with. ;-) (Thanks Tom! I think...?) You can tell me about it later Tom. Some people I thought were going to show up didnt. Uncle Frank of all people didnt show up. My friends Ryan and Sarah came. They are great people. I spent a good portion of the night talking to them. Ones going to be a firefighter, one an English teacher. I think they are a good match.
Yes mom, the lemon squares came out great. I might have errored on the side of cooking them a bit too long but they still taste great! ;-)
And its snowing again! yipee! Im about to get myself ready to go out in the cold. ;-) My first thought this morning was, "Man, I wish I was skiing". Someday soon I will live on the slopes for at least one winter. Ron got his ski jump going and I will be spending some time in Aspen this winter. Cant wait! Adieu!

Significant Events

2005-12-05T18:07:00.000-07:00

Ever have something happen to you and you couldn't help but think that this just couldn't be random coincidence, it must mean something for my future or even for now or understanding of the past? Sorry for the run-on sentence, but I seemed to have a string of these incidences happen in the past few days.
People from my past have come back into my life, people in my present are leaving my world as I know it, and new people have entered my life who I never thought could mean so much to me. Again, I apologize for I am speaking in generalities.
Choosing when to share one's opinions and when to keep them to themself is a piece of wisdom that we should all strive for. But I must be open now.
Rob is leaving our church to be replaced by a high school pastor. I think he knew his time would eventually come, but it almost made me cry. It felt like just when I was getting to know him, and we were really getting the worship band together, they ask him to leave. Now some responsibility is put on me that I have always wanted, and Im afraid I dont have the time to truly dedicate myself to it. But there does not need to be fear in ones life. Fear is only created when one isnt open to the world and all it has to offer.
In any case, Thanksgiving was great. Frank cooked some awesome food once again and we still have leftovers that need to be thrown out. This weekend we put up our tree and decorations for Christmas. It feels so weird, but I guess it always feels weird when you first do something, and then it doesnt feel weird anymore. It feels normal. And thats how we grow I guess. By being open to new people, things, and experiences, but also, and more importantly I believe, is that we are open to the idea, and the reality, that for us to grow, we have to let go of who we were, and become who we are meant to be.

For whatever reason...

2005-11-20T21:28:00.000-07:00

...I've decided to look more into the way I live as a world citizen. This has been precipitated by a number of events, but most recently by typing the words, "save the world" into google. So I stumble upon a blog that intrigues me to no end.
So I got up today like any normal Sunday and left a little after 7am to go and play bass for the 9am service. Most of today was such a blur that it seems crazy that 14 hours have gone by. I went to both services, tried to fix my Jeep, had lunch with Tom and Susan where we talked about biology and all the random things I love talking about, came home, tried to fix my Jeep but couldnt because of one little stripped screw, watched Star Wars, Episode 3, and here I am. What have I done today? hmmmm.
So how do I live a better life? And what is a better life? Whats important to me and how do I know that it is important? These are all questions that have started to vex me more and more. Everyone needs purpose. But at the same time people need to realize that we are put on this Earth for such a short time, and then our bodies return to the Earth from which it came. Our purpose is to live, and it is to die. The problem is that all men die, not all men truly live. I just want to truly live. Amen.

Da Update

2005-11-19T18:59:00.000-07:00

So yeah, Tom got the Harley. Im excited for him. Ill be even more excited when I get my bike in the spring. I would probably do it now too, but the money just isnt there. Its kinda funny actually. Im better off then Ive ever been yet poorer then Ive ever been. Yeah, to understand that you gotta understand debt. Its a nasty evil in this world. But is it a necessary evil one should ask? hmmm.
So I booked another painting job today. Its kinda funny. Im already 2 weeks into my new job and Im still booking new work. I knew it would happen but it was kinda surprising. I had to give up on an exterior job we wanted to get done because of the weather. Ah, so be it. One of the biggest lessons Ive learned so far is to know when Im pushing too hard. Yes, everyone has to strive and work hard for things, but there is a time and a place where pushing harder doesnt bring any greater reward. I found that limit more then once this past year and now Im living accordingly.
My new job is going really great. I am truly blessed to have probably the best boss one could even hope or wish for. He is just this wonderful caring guy thats full of wisdom and knowledge from years in the business word. Guru in the truest sense of the word. Finally, a person I can really learn from. Im excited. I have no hesitations whatsoever.
Thanksgiving is upon us. We are still trying to decide what we are going to do. We have been invited over a friends house for Thanksgiving dinner, but we have been talking about doing it here. Of course, we really havent planned accordingly so I need to talk to Tom about what we are going to do, cause we need to rsvp soon.
For all of you who I havent seen in awhile know that Im missing you. The holiday season really brings that out in me. Hope this message finds you in good spirits and in good times. ;-)

Some tidbits about Colorado ;-)

2005-11-18T17:49:00.000-07:00

After living here in Colorado for 2.5 years I actually found this funny. Hopefully you do as well. For you out-of-staters, if you dont understand, feel free to ask. ;-) believe me, you will want to know the answers to some of these. enjoy...

You Know You're From Colorado When...
People move onto the highway at 15 miles an hour. You have absolutely no recognizable accent. If the humidity gets above 25%, you consider it "muggy". You only go to Central City when friends are in from out of town. You have been skiing less than 10 times in your life You think 5-points is a ghetto. You are the third car to run a red light after it has changed. You say things like "I don't care how big Golden is, it's still a one-horse town". You think only stupid people get lost in your town. When giving directions, you never say "Turn left, turn right", it's always go West, then South. During a thunderstorm you wonder "which I-25 underpass is flooding". You never plan a picnic between 3:30 and 6:00 in Spring or Summer months. If it rains more than 2 days straight you compare the weather to being in Seattle. You voted for higher taxes to fund Coors field, but voted down taxes for public transportation. You have a broken windshield. You see no reason to travel to Aurora. The only RTD bus you've been on is the 16th Street shuttle. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike on top of your $500 car. You thought "Californication" would be banned by Amendment 2. You think "South Park" is a place to stop for gas on your way to Buena Vista. You have a business degree and are frying burgers at a McDonald's in Vail. You have a flat tire in your refrigerator and your garage. You own a big dog named Aspen, Buck, Cheyenne or Dakota that wears a bandanna. You cast out your fishing line while white-water rafting. You've never seen the tourist attractions in your own city. You think a pass does not involve a football or a woman. You are 82 years old and take up snowboarding. Your real Y2K fear was running out of Celestial Seasonings tea and trail mix. The entire top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail. You personally wouldn't pay $10 per head to drive up Pikes Peak unless it was the only mountain on earth, but you tell all our house-guests to do it. You get depressed after one day of foggy weather. You think that formal wear is ironed denim. North means "mountains to the left;" south is "mountains to the right;" and east and west are where all those damned liberals keep moving in from. You go anywhere else on the planet and the air feels "sticky" and you notice the sky is no longer blue. You consider a three-piece suit to be a pair of shorts, a sweatshirt and Birkenstocks. You see your East Coast relatives now more than when you lived there. You think gun control is a steady hand. You can run up 10 flights of stairs without huffing and puffing. You've stood on solid ground and looked down on an airplane in flight. You know what the "Peoples Republic of Boulder" means. You're a meat eating vegetarian. You think the major food groups are Boulder Bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer. You've been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate your local sports team's victory. You can drive over a 12,000 foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can't get to work if there are 4 inches of snow. You know the correct pronunciation of Buena Vista. When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz. Your car insurance costs more than your car. You have surge protectors on every outlet. April showers bring May blizzards. You see someone riding a Harley in a snowstorm, and you look closer to see if it's anyone you know. "Timberline" is someplace you have actually been. Many times. You know what a "Chinook" is. You know what a "rocky mountain oyster" is. You know what a "fourteener" is. But you don't know what a "turn signal" is. A bear on your front porch doesn't bother you nearly as much as a Democrat in Congress does. Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning-rod. People from other states breathe 5 times as often as you do. Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn't seem strange. Thunder has set off your car alarm. A sudden loss of cabin pressure is not a big deal. "Where we're going, we don't need roads!" You know where Doc Holliday's grave is. You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight. Driving directions usually include 'Go over ____ Pass...' You've used "checking for ticks" as an excuse to get someone naked. You've gone skiing in July. You've gone sunbathing in January. They were both in the same year. You get a certain feeling of satisfaction from knowing that California and Texas are both downstream You know the elevation of a town, but not its population. You never pack away your coat and sweaters. You can name only two people you know who were actually born in Colorado. You call tumbleweed "groundcover". You love your Broncos, your Avs, your Rockies, Nuggets - well you can't have everything. You or someone you know plays golf 12 months of the year. You don't have AC in your home, but you use it in your car all winter long. If it snows in the morning you expect it to be gone by lunchtime. You can name the states that make up the Four Corners. You know what and where the Continental Divide is. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Colorado.

Fun Stuff

2005-11-13T14:53:00.000-07:00

So I got some fun stuff for you guys. One is a quiz and the other is a link to a fun game. Enjoy!

You are a Samurai.
You are full of honour and value respect. You
are not really the stereotypical hero, but you
do fight for good. Just in your own way. For
you, it is most certainly okay to kill an evil
person, if it is for justice and peace. You
also don't belive in mourning all the time and
think that once you've hit a bad stage in life
you just have to get up again. It's pointless
to concentrate on emotional pain and better to
just get on with everything. You also are a
down to earth type of person and think before
you act. Impulsive people may annoy you
somewhat.

Main weapon: Sword
Quote: "Always do the right thing.
This will gratify some people and astonish the
rest" -Mark Twain
Facial expression: Small smile

What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla

A fun game involving Monkey poop. Brain numbing entertainment for hours!
http://www.monkeypoopfight.com

What a day!

2005-11-05T18:59:00.000-07:00

...And it isn't even over yet. I guess the day started at midnight last night. We had just got done playing some capture the flag at camp and started playing some mafia. That was short lived cause no one really knowed how to really play. Anyhow, we decided to play spoons instead. Thats an evil game. We had a couple bumps and bruises, and some blood drawn, but everyone came out ok. It started snowing sometime between then. I love those crisp cold silent nights in the mountains. Nearly all of us slept in the lodge, and I must have been pretty tired around 4am cause I went to sleep quick even though I was surrounded by teenagers doing teenager things. Overall, they are a pretty mature group I would say.
So on the way back from camp I slid into another Jeep and had a little fender bender. It wasnt really any big deal but we had to wait for the state police to come from Fairplay which is 1.5 hours away. The person that caused the accident just left the scene. She did a full 360 and ran up on the bank and nearly flipped her SUV. I was the one in the back and it was nearly inevitable that I hit someone. But we are all safe so thats all that matters.
Right now, we are cooking up Tom's moms famous spinach manicotti. I cant wait to dig in. Ive been doing some reading and that always helps me take my mind off the more stressful things in life. Soon we are getting our projector system set up and I thought to myself. Soon after that I need to get a new Mini DV camcorder so I can starting doing short films again and editing and showing them on our projector screen. That will be so cool. Anyhow, thats my randomness for today. Hope you enjoyed it. Here is my random link for the day... LINK

Im Back

2005-11-02T18:41:00.000-07:00

And better then ever. I got the job I was after working for All Copy Products as an Account Rep. for them. Im so excited. They pay me a nice base salary plus commission, bonuses, car allowance, and the chance to win trips for high sales volume. They offer wonderful training and the Sales Manager Im going to be working with seems to be a wonderful guy that I can learn a lot from and actually enjoy working for. No working evenings and weekends for me anymore. Im so happy. I start Monday the 7th.
So yeah, the future is looking brighter. My friend is asking me to go to Thailand in March. I hope I have the money and the ability to take that much time off to go. It will be so wonderful to get away for awhile. Thats about all the news for now. Ill keep you updated as always. Hope you guys are having a wonderful time. And guess what, Thanksgiving is right around the corner! Cheers....

Hiatus

2005-10-23T08:39:00.000-06:00

I have decided to take a hiatus from blogger for the time being. The reason is that I want to write my thoughts out on paper. I have a journal that I keep, but I havent written in it since August and so much has happened since then. I really need to recollect myself and find out what I really think and believe and where I want to go in this life.
It may be a week, it may be a month, or it may be longer, but I will be back eventually. Best wishes to all of you who read this. ;-)

The Weekend

2005-10-19T08:11:00.000-06:00

So I flew home Friday for Alex's wedding. I hung out with my dad for the most part on Friday and we talked alot about business. I had dinner with my immediate family including Ryan at Johnny Curino's that night. It was great. Then we hung out at my sisters place. She is doing well for herself and Ryan is doing well too.
I had a Chi Alpha reunion on Saturday. My other sister went with me and we had a blast. I dont think they could have asked for a better wedding. I loved it. Great music and worship. P.Mike made us all laugh, and realize what a wonderful couple they are. Jen. Cory, Evan, and Amber were in the wedding party. They all looked so good. Cory, Evan, and this other guy played jimbay, sax, and guitar. They were so good.
The reception was kinda short, but sweet. My fav part was dancing with the bride. I wish I knew her better. She is such a beautiful kind young lady and Im so happy for her and Alex. They will make a great team.
We dropped my sister off at her apartment and then I went to hang out with the Chi Alpha crew. It was fun.
Sunday I slept in at Rons place and we had lunch together. I came back from Pittsburgh to hang out with my parents again before I left and to see Tom and Sarah. We had a Bible study that night that was really great about suffering and what it really means.
Monday morning my dad took me to the airport but I missed my flight because the security line was so long. It was a blessing in disguise because I stayed an extra day and got to see my cousin and my aunt. I also got to talk more to my dad about business stuff. And I talked alot about business with my cousin as well.
So the game plan is still the same it just got more intense. I gotta make it work or die trying just like I did with the painting business. I want to get a steady job with a steady paycheck that will pay the bills for the time being. It will do two things. One, allow me not to worry too much about paying the bills. Two, remind me everyday how much I need to get my own business up and running. ;-) So thats the gameplan. Of course, Ill keep you updated. But please pray for me, so that Gods will be done in my life. Amen.

lost, so lost.

2005-10-12T20:07:00.000-06:00

Am I ever going to find where I belong? Thats the question of the day. I dont feel like I should stick around become a franchise developer for these guys. I like the idea but I have no real input into how the business is run or organized. They listen to my ideas, but implementing them is a different story. Granted, I dont think I can find this freedom in any other job, but I cant take it anymore. Painting and construction for that matter is such a unique business. Its one of the few businesses where employees regularly dont show up for work. Its a business with the pickiest customers. Or at least it seems that way.
So Ive kind of reversed my trends as of late. My ultimate goal is to have my own business and help other people start their own businesses. This "job" has taught me a lot about running my own business, and perhaps it has some lessons yet to teach me, but I feel the need to really move on. I have felt this need before as you know from reading previous blogs but Ive decided once and for all to leave. Im going back to the regular employee world for the time being, and I have decided to start a business part-time. I will get that business up and running to where it can support me and then I will really be at the end of the beginning. ;-)
Right now Im probably in the worst of worlds. The headaches of a business owner without actually owning the business. Im thinking hard about getting another commissioned sales, but Im having trouble finding ones that will really help me learn and grow. I need and want to work with a company that has a true mission that doesnt really deal with the bottom line. And they are hard to find it seems. Im also looking for a great team of people to work with. I feel so alone right now, mainly because the people I would work with are located in Ft. Collins. *sigh*
I will find what Im looking for. I had hoped someone would be able to take the journey with me, but it seems Im destined to truly take this trip alone. Not alone in the sense that people wont help me along the way, but alone in the sense that I wont have someone walk that path right beside me each step of the way, except perhaps the man upstairs. ;-) Very few people have the feelings I am having right now, and Id say this might be one of the first times Ive ever experienced them, but we must all follow our heart or die knowing the greatness in us was never allowed to come out.

Franchise It!

2005-10-05T13:04:00.000-06:00

So I had my meeting with the owners yesterday. They decided it wasn't in mine or their best interest to hire more managers for the company. They have built the whole company for the purpose of franchising it and that is what they are going to do in a years time. Whats my part in it all?
As an area developer I get to sell the business opportunity to people interested in franchising the Mcguyver name and provide training and support till they get their businesses off the ground. I get a upfront commission and a royalty income from all revenue generated by the businesses I help start. Much better then trying to hire and train a lot of managers.
The company is building value into the name and has basically created business systems that allow a guy like me to come in here and start my own painting business. Which is basically what I did. Ive been the most sucessful person in the company thus far and have the vision to take it where it needs to go.
Five years from now Ill be semi-retired from Mcguyver Painting and probably pursuing some other business ventures. I gotta work my butt off now, but it all pays off in the end. The road is just beginning. ;-)

Considering my Lifestyle

2005-10-02T18:57:00.000-06:00

Lifestyle, how we live is as important as ever. We all strive to be better and often when we mean better we mean better then the next guy. If we dont we suffer and go down in our happiness levels. Here's the link. http://www.fastcompany.com/online/68/richlife.html
Here is a quote from the article worth reading, "As it turns out, by the time we get to be our grandmother's age, we'll be happier anyway. That's because happiness over any given lifetime looks like a big U-curve. "You start out thinking that you're going to conquer the world," says Oswald. "Then you discover that it's tough out there and become dissatisfied. Happiness levels tend to bottom out around 30. Eventually, after 5 or 10 years, you come to terms with yourself. You learn to control your aspirations. After you've done that, it's easier to get steadily happier again."
I have started to think about how I live my life in terms of lifestyle after a recent conversation with my friend Lisa. We were just talking about work and other things and she said what seemed a peculiar thing at the time. She said, "Im starting to think about lifestyle now". The important word in the sentence isnt lifestyle like Im stressing. The important word is NOW. Why wasnt she thinking it earlier? Why wasnt I thinking it earlier? Isnt lifestyle what I have been searching for all along? Isnt it why I moved out here to Colorado? Isnt it why I spend my spare moments doing what I can to satisfy my urge to be, do, see what makes me joyful?
Read the article, bookmark it, then read it again. You will be glad you did. ;-)

all better ;-)

2005-10-01T09:33:00.000-06:00

Well yesterday I ate a grand total of a piece of toast and a bagel with cream cheese. I visited my job site yesterday to deliver some extra paint and check things out. The homeowner felt really bad for me. oh well. i went home and took a 2 hour nap and then went to my 3pm estimate. she asked me if I was the same person on the phone cause I sounded different. i told her I was a little sick. haha, what an understatement. then after that I made some calls to make sure everything was all right on the job site. it was, so I just went home.
I collapsed on my bed around 5:30ish and woke up about 7:30ish this morning. 14 hours of straight sleeping sure does a body good. ;-) Now I feel like new. haha. ANd yes I am aspiring to the Ironman. You'd think me crazy if you knew me.
now I go to play some volleyball and Im headed up to camp later to play some capture the flag, and hang out with the "kiddos". latas...

Current Condition=Hurting

2005-09-30T08:57:00.000-06:00

*Warning- The content you are about to read may not be suitable for women, children, or even men for that matter. Read at your own risk...

So Ive been having a hectic stressful week and I think that has caused my body to go into a tailspin. It doesnt really like me anymore and I know the reason why. I havent been taking care of it as I should. I have been running and going nonstop for awhile. So last night I got home around 7pm after a long day at work. I felt fine up till then, but I was tired and felt like just going to sleep. I was like, ok, i may wake up at 3am and not be able to get back to bed, but so what Im going to sleep right now.
So I lie down and I start feeling queasy. I was like, wow, I havent thrown up in a long time. I went to the toilet and nothing was happening so I went to grab a garbage can and empty it out so I could keep it beside my bed. Well I got to the garbage can but never made it to my bed. I ran into the bathroom and heaved till I could heave no more. (feel free to stop reading here).
Then I turned around and had pretty much nonstop diarrhea for awhile. I sat there for awhile trying to figure when it would all come to an end, but it lasted quite some time. Luckily, my roomate who used to be an EMT came home and made sure I was going to be alright. They gave me some water to drink but I just puked that back up. He check my blood pressure twice, first it was 100/60 and then it was 90/70. My temp came out to be 95.9 and I was breaking into cold sweats. I was severely dehydrated.
After puking a third time they were ready to take my to the hospital and I almost went but decided not to go. Time had no more meaning as I endured the pain.
I eventually got into bed and woke up several times to get more water and unload some unwanted bodily fluids.
So I got up this morning still feeling like crap, but so far so good with the puking/diarrhea stuff. I do have a headache and feel really weird and IM afriad to eat anything, but I know I gotta get something in me soon.
Im also planning on working a bit today and going up to camp this weekend. We will see how that goes. God, I dont know when to just rest. ill let you know how it goes....

Current Mood=Blah

2005-09-27T06:50:00.000-06:00

So Ive been working a lot recently. My crew foreman quit right before I was about to fire him yesterday. I was already having a bad morning when he called to complain about a bunch of nonsense and I basically explained the situation to him and he didnt want to hear any of it. He told me I was wrong and I got really angry and shouted back dont tell me Im wrong. Look we'll talk later, just get your stuff done.
So I guess he sulked around for a good 15 - 20 minutes and called me back. I was at the paint store this time, and he basically said he was quitting for no good reason except he was being a baby and couldnt man up. I said Im not going to try and convince you to stay (which is what he wanted to hear). After I got off the phone, I walked back up to the counter and got my paint. The first comment out of the sales rep.'s mouth was, "babysitting today?" I chuckled a bit and I said, yeah like everyday.
I hate being 25 and babysitting someone who is 32 and should technically be more mature then me. Nothing worse then being 32, not married, and living with your parents cause you cant make it in the "real world". God help me never to be like that.
So, ok. Im dont venting. So I get to tell all my customers that I dont know when I can get to painting their houses and time is running out for good weather to get things done. *sigh* I just want to run away to the mountains and live like all the other mountain bums do. I truly feel stuck between 2 worlds. One where I have all this responsbility I do now, and one where I can live a carefree lifestyle and have very little responsibility.
In any case, I gotta get to work now. Ill probably put in close to a 12 hour day like I did yesterday. Im not eating right, sleeping right, or even in my right mind it seems sometimes. I live in such a stupor. The days fly right by, and I hate it. I dont wanna just survive, I wanna thrive. Ah, it all cant last forever. ;-)

just to let you know

2005-09-21T09:38:00.000-06:00

I decided to stay with Mcguyver Painting. One of the main reasons is that now that I have traveled down this path of entreprenuership Im not headed back. The company has given me the opportunity to work in business development with them and I will be in charge of training and working with new managers as we build a painting empire here in Denver. Its exciting times for me. Im hoping to get equity in the business so that once its a multi-million dollar company I can retire and still have a check coming to me in the mail. Then I can go on to build other companies. All in good time I guess.
"My inner vision becomes my outer reality"

Never believe this...

2005-09-18T17:16:00.000-06:00

So I first go to this guys blog site and its freakin hilarious. I found it by going to the Everyone's Allowed blog now changed to Come and Knock on Our Door. Anyhow here is the link to that guys site. http://thecasualfriday.blogspot.com/ Freakin Hilarious!
Now I read some of the comments and go to this chicks blog site. Whats the first blog?! Its about Sept 11th. I go wow, someone actually took the time to blog about Sept 11th. Read my blog below... And guess what, I read her blog a little more and realize she is from Canada!!! The Canadians are remembering Sept 11th more then us. Whats wrong with this picture>? Someone tell me please!

What happened to Sept 11th???

2005-09-18T15:46:00.000-06:00

I was just thinking. I didnt really hear anything in the news on Sept 11th about anything. I think maybe George Bush spoke somewhere but Im not sure. Have we already forgotten about it all 4 short years later? Im speaking mostly of myself here, and granted I dont really know whats going on in the outside world cause I dont watch tv or read the news, but I feel like I should have heard about it more.
I cried the day it happened, and I cried a year later. Last year I at least remembered the lives lost on that tragic day, and this year I dont really remember even what I did. I know I was coming back from the mountains last Sunday and I think I did some work related stuff.
We are still fighting a war in Iraq and Afganistan even though the worst is over. We are still losing many lives over there. Yet its still OVER THERE for most of us. Now another more recent tragedy has replaced the older one. Katrina. I guess the best thing for us to do is count our lucky stars and thank God we are alive one more day. Our time is but a breath. And we should be pushing to really go after the more meaningful things in life, whatever they may be for you. Enough said...

Thanks to God...

2005-09-06T16:36:00.000-06:00

I got the job! Now I have to put up or shutup. The fun is just beginning. I will take this as a sign that God actually wants me to succeed in this job and He wont let me fail. If I make the money they say Im going to make I just pray God helps me to use it wisely. Ill pay off my debts, invest it in the short term in like a CD or something, maybe some stocks, and keep some liquid assests in the bank. Long term Ill be able to travel like I want to in 3 years, go to the 2008 Oylmpics, and help my friends start their businesses. Mainly I just want to be debt free except for my house. Having a years worth of house payments in the bank doesnt sound bad either.
Like Eminem said, "You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime". Like the guy said I could get into it and be out in a week, but I doubt that will happen. We shall see. Im excited to start. My heart skipped a beat when I got the message that I got the job. I have to find out why he ended up choosing me. ha, guess it doesnt matter in the end. Onto a new and exciting adventure! ;-)

Killer Instinct

2005-09-06T11:12:00.000-06:00

So I just had the most interesting interview of my life at this company I hope to work for. To recap, its a commissioned sales position selling steel buildings to all sorts of various people and companies. The commissions are very high and people regularly make 100,000+.
So I sat down for my second interview and recapped what I talked about in the 1st interview with the other guy I interviewed with. We started talking about the position and he asked me why I would be good at it. I recapped that the previous interviewer said I sounded great on the phone and that is one of the major prereq's for the job. I also said that I am very good at building rapport with people and I help them make buying decisions.
He sat back and thought for a moment and said, you seem too laid back to me, and that I dont seem like I have that "killer instinct". You know what I mean? And I said, I know exactly what you mean when I wasnt too sure of what he meant. I started telling him about my competitive sports background and how I am number one in sales in my current company. I also told him a little bit about what I do in my current role and he didnt seem to care much. He told me sales is emotional. Everytime you hang up with a customer your chance of making a sale drops 50%. You gotta make the sale when you have the chance.
Then he said Im really on the fence about you. He asked how old I was and I told him. He said you have a lot of management experience for someone so young and I agreed. He then said he wants to give me a chance like he got a chance when he was younger.
Then he asked me how much I want to make. I actually am forgetting what I told him, but once I said it, he said, "Thats the politically correct answer, now tell me the real one". I started talking but realized he wanted a figure so I said 100k. He went on to tell me he makes 10000 a month and wants every sales guy to make even more. He said a guy made a 13k check last month and he was wondering what I would do with the money once I got it seeing how Im young, make ONLY 40k a year, and probably wouldnt know what to do with so much money. I said I would pay off my debt and travel.
He also voiced his concern that if I made that much would I lay off a bit or would I continue selling. (Again basically saying Im too laid back). I said it is about the money but it isnt. I told him I want to be one of the top sales guys in his company if not THE top sales guy.
With that he said Im still on the fence but part of me wants to give you a try. He also reminded me that I could come in here and go through training and be asked to leave the following week if I cant learn things quick enough or whatever. He said as long as I am comfortable with being on straight commission and can pick things up quickly then things should be ok, but to know that I could start on board Friday and be out of a job the following Friday. He said Im sure your company would take you back if you're their #1 sales guy. I agreed and told him I understood. He said he is still on the fence, but he feels like there might be something underneath the surface.
Then he said I have 8 more interviews today and depending on how things go I might hire you. He said either way Ill give you a call by 5pm to let you know. The last thing I asked him was, "Do I have everything going for me except the killer instinct?" He said, "yes". I said the usual nice meeting you and talk to you later. He gave me a slap on the back. lol.
So right now Im clueless as to whether he will hire me or not, and I think he is clueless too. He is on the fence about me. I really hope he decides to give me a chance. What would I do with all the money? Invest it for the future, thats what.
So Ill be writing later today to let you know how things went. Hopefully either way this turns out to be a learning process for me. All I know is, that if I can sell myself to that guy I can ace any interview. If he decides not to hire me I would be 100% confident in knowing that I wouldnt be right for the position anyway. Id tell him he should give me a chance, but he knows the position better then I do and who I am I to say otherwise.
So here is my fingers crossed....

Labor Day

2005-09-05T13:05:00.000-06:00

Ah, isnt it beautiful? A day dedicated to all the hard work us Americans have done to acheive what we have acheived. A day of rest for all those who work hard. Too bad many of my friends have to work today. Its a shame, but what you gonna do? Thats America, home of the workaholics. Here is a link if you are interested in the history of Labor Day.
So I ended up not going to Newcomers Home. I didnt want to go by myself and apparently no one really likes bluegrass. If they only knew how good this band was! We ended up renting the Transporter in preparation for watching the Transporter 2 coming out soon. ;-)
Yesterday was a blast. We played some Ultimate Frisbee in the afternoon and I got to meet some new people and catch up with an old aquaintence of mine, Grant. It was great to get a game of Ultimate going. I havent played in a long time.
Then we went back to our house and more people started arriving. We played some cards for awhile and I learned a new game called "13". Its pretty interesting. Then my rock climbing friend got the idea that it would be fun to climb on my house because we have a bunch of bricks that stick out from the rest. I said, yeah, Ive done it once before. And we commenced climbing all the way around my house. It was him, his wife, and me. His wife made it further then all of us before falling last. It is an endurance workout for sure. I told him he could come over anytime and climb my house. lol.
I stayed up till 3am just talking to people and everyone kinda left one at a time. Its the one sad thing about parties, everyone has to eventually leave.
Anyhow, today I dont know what we are doing. My roomate just asked me, "Did you know I made plans to go to a cookout today?" And I was like, yes. He was like I dont remember that. lol. Our friends had invited us to a cookout and Tom was too inebriated to remember it. Anyhow, its breakfast time at one in the afternoon. Latas...

Da Update

2005-09-01T16:32:00.000-06:00

So those advantage rent a car people turn out to be pretty lame. I didnt interview for either the management position or the trainer position. Instead I interview for an entry level CSR position where I would get paid pretty decently, but its not looking like Ill take that job. I might like to try it part-time but probably not. The one thing that makes it look better and better everyday is that I would have a really short commute. I can make it there in like 10-15 minutes.
I have a second interview for the sales position on Tuesday. It looks very promising but Im not getting my hopes up. Basically Id be selling these steel buildings and the commisions are very high on them. The guy said its not unrealistic to sell one a week and they sell them nationwide so... He said I was a strong candidate and I am meeting with a totally different guy on Tuesday. Ill let you know how it goes.
Things are finally settling down a bit with painting. I still need to find another painter, but if Im sticking with this I really need to up my marketing efforts to get more business. WSS.
I finally called that chick I was dating after a week and a half. I left a message and she called me back the next day. We talked a little bit and she said she would come to the labor day party on Sunday. Ill be happy to see her again and see how things go between us: whether they become weird or not. Ill try my best not to be weird but sometimes you just cant help it, ya know?
Speaking of the party, we are playing some ultimate frisbee at 3pm and starting the party at 7pm if anyone wants to come. Beer and burgers for everyone! ;-) Newcomers Home is playing on Saturday at the Taste of Colorado so Im going to do that too. This weekend is going to be a blast and Im going to so just chilllllll on Monday. ;-)
So thats the update. Cant wait for this weekend! Later gators....

More then anything...

2005-08-31T18:52:00.000-06:00

...I just want to be happy. Is that too much to ask? So I love taking these career tests. I love taking tests in general. Am I not weird? Anyhow, here is the results of one test.

Career Inventory Test Results

Extroversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%
Emotional Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	40%
Altruism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	53%
Inquisitiveness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	66%

You are an Inventor, possible professions include - systems designer, venture capitalist, actor, journalist, investment broker, real estate agent, real estate developer, strategic planner, political manager, politician, special projects developer, literary agent, restaurant/bar owner, technical trainer, diversity manager, art director, personnel systems developer, computer analyst, logistics consultant, outplacement consultant, advertising creative director, radio/TV talk show host.

Take Free Career Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

So you guys tell me, which career path should I go after among the ones listed above. I have three ones Im considering right now: economist, hydrologist, and urban planner. They can be added to the list. As always I could stay in management and sales, but I dont think I should continue to get better at something I dont like very much. Its sad that Im good at something I dont really like. I want to apply it to something I do like and one of my dreams is to help my friends and family start their own businesses. So I dont know, you tell me what you think would be a good career path for me. all suggestions welcome. ;)_

Still Sick...

2005-08-30T22:12:00.000-06:00

Yes, Tom convinced me to go to the doctor today. Cost me 25 bucks for the doctors visit and 10 bucks for the amoxycillin. You may think its cheap but I think its a rip off. The doctors spends maybe 5 minutes with you and writes a prescription out. God, I should be a drug dealer and make easy cash like that. lol.
The other thing killing me is gas prices. Its close to 3 bucks a gallon now. Tom and I are buying motorcycles very soon. With the cost of gas being the way it is they practically pay for themselves in the money you save from driving gas guzzling Jeeps and Mustangs. We can thank hurricane Katrina for that.
I have two job interviews tomorrow for some very promising positions. If I get them both I once again have to decide on commision vs. salary. gotta love it. Its kinda funny cause the salary position is an interesting one. So I applied for a recruiter/trainer position with Advantage Rent a Car. And I get a phone call from the lady that hires for them. I was busy so I said I would call her back later and she gave me her cell. I thought that was rather strange. So I call back and she asks me a few questions about my previous work experience. (I had previously worked with Hertz rent a car.) So I told her and she said, I know you applied for this position but we have a position I think you would be great for. Im like, ok, tell me. And basically they want to hire me for some operations managaer position at Denver Int'l airport. I asked her what my responsbilities would be and how many people I would be overseeing and stuff. She said they do over a million dollars a month in volume and I would be supervising upwards of 40 employees. it gets better.... ;-)
The other job Im applying for is a sales position where I would be selling steel fabricated buildings to people interested in building various buildings, houses, churches, industrial and commercial buildings, etc. Basically Id still get to be a contractor, I would just be contracting different stuff. Supposedly the commisions are huge and I could be making upwards of 100k a year.
Both sound a little too good to be true, but Im going in with both eyes open. If these jobs are half of what they are made out to be then it would be good. Tomorrow Ill let you guys know how things turned out. Right now I must get some beauty rest. ;-)

Im sick

2005-08-29T20:44:00.000-06:00

Yeah, I got it all. Sore throat, runny nose, sneezing, coughing, congestion, hurting, headache, diarrhea, etc. Yeah I know you like that last one. Upset stomach to match too! But enough about me, what about me?
Yeah, so Im job hunting. As usual... sometimes I wonder if Im better off just sticking with what I got? But I dont want to settle when I know there could be many more things out there that are so much better. Will I never be satisfied? Am I truly ADD? Maybe not in the larger sense, but maybe IN the larger sense. Am I making any sense?
I gotta find something that can keep my interest long term. I just always want to improve things. Is that so wrong? I always want to strive to improve and be better. Partly competitive, but its mostly about hope. Hope for something better. That there is something better. But am I truly doomed to never finding satisfaction is that is the case? If I always strive for something better, can I never be happy with what I have? Hmmm. Contentedness. we shall see...

Realization

2005-08-25T19:19:00.000-06:00

How we get hung up on other people..... only did I realize by watching someone else do it. ever knowing I was doing the same thing and still willing to do it even though I knew it was stupid.
JDay9821: I get hung up on girls
anonymous: why? Unless you spend a lot of time and pour love into them, why?
anonymous: they're just girls
JDay9821: one word,....
JDay9821: hope
anonymous: hope for the one?
JDay9821: hope things might work out even if we are lying to ourselves
JDay9821: we cant accept that things just didnt work out with that person
anonymous: does that mean I'm hopeless. I don't feel hopeless.
JDay9821: we hang on to the good things, ignoring the bad things, and say, If only....
JDay9821: not that things couldn;t work out
anonymous: Yes, I do want to find my soulmate, but it's really not my priority. I hope for it, and wish for it, but I wish and hope for a job and a chance to see Italy more so than a boyfriend. Does that sound cold and superficial?
anonymous: Or maybe I'm deluding myself into thinking that so I won't hope and be crushed. Or maybe I really don't have a deep desire for it. No, that's not true because I do want to share my life and have a family. Yea, it's pretty much a big mess.
JDay9821: No it doesnt. I guess no matter how much I know we arent meant for each other I still hope that things could maybe work out in the end
anonymous: why? You need to let go when you know they aren't the one. You're wasting time and their time. Meanwhile, the one meant for you or the other might pass you by.
JDay9821: "we" as in those girls I still have hope for
JDay9821: yes there is more then one
anonymous: Really more than one you hope for? Like a lottery of sorts ;-)
JDay9821: maybe
anonymous: OK, tell me about some of the girls in the running and why.
JDay9821: guess it all comes from the question, have I met her yet and dont know it, or is she yet to come? who else is out there? is there really only one girl for me?
JDay9821: Im not even going to begin telling you about the girls I might be interested in
anonymous: good question. Maybe there will be many that will pass through your life, but one that God has planned for you. Or maybe God has three planned for you. I have no idea.
anonymous: whynot?
JDay9821: three planned for me, like a harem of sorts ;-)
anonymous: yea, Jeremy the sultan. You do live in a bachelor pad after all.
JDay9821: because ultimately circumstances would probably prevent me from being with any of them, at least thats the case at the moment
JDay9821: lol
anonymous: so what's the point of hoping for them?
anonymous: if you know already there's no way
JDay9821: thats just the point Im trying to make
JDay9821: you know it hasnt worked out, but you hope anyhow
anonymous: don't waste your time.
anonymous: Time and love are precious.
JDay9821: well thanks
JDay9821: im not anyhow
anonymous: alright, alright...don't get your panties in a bunch
anonymous: ;-)
JDay9821: its just you cant help but hope sometimes that circumstances will change, people will come around, etc...
anonymous: people don't come around
anonymous: maybe you or they will change, so feelings might change, yes. But if they don't change, nothing changes.
JDay9821: it can also be argued that people dont change
anonymous: true that.
JDay9821: circumstances change though
anonymous: or rather, you can't change people, only God can offer them the chance and they can choose to change.
JDay9821: sometimes its hard to tell the difference
JDay9821: especially if you're deluded
JDay9821: kinda like Romeo and Juliet
anonymous: circumstances definitely change, but usually people don't I agree
anonymous: One thing I've learned, you take people as is. Damaged goods and all.
JDay9821: anyhow, im just saying that hope keeps us
JDay9821: aint it the truth@!
anonymous: I suppose in a way I too hope. Hope to find someone who'll think I'm great. Faults, idiosyncracies, hangups, and all. Just like everyone else.
JDay9821: I guess maybe Im hoping that someone in my life right now could be that person, and u hope someone will come into your life
anonymous: I suppose also that I keep my hopes closer to my heart and aren't so obvious about. I'm more guarded and weaker than you are in that aspect.
anonymous: that's a good way of putting it Jeremy.
anonymous: friendships are more of a sure thing, romantic relationships aren't.
JDay9821: true
JDay9821: i always try to turn my relationships into friendships
anonymous: You can be dumped, battered, beaten, and left to rot at any turn.
anonymous: how?
anonymous: unless it's an amicable split, that's impossible.
anonymous: ultimately one is dumped.
JDay9821: if things dont work out Im accepting of that fact, and I just do what a friend does
anonymous: usually one is dumped because the other finds something lacking in the other person and that cuts deep. Things can't be hunk dory after that
JDay9821: im clear on my expectations, and hopes
JDay9821: no, but time heals all wounds
JDay9821: granted it doesnt always work but Ive been happy to call many girls Ive had romantic relationships with friends
anonymous: yes it does, but time also changes people. And you think back to "what the hell was I thinking?"
JDay9821: lol
JDay9821: maybe
JDay9821: but more often then not, its why didnt I see this side of her before, and I appreciate them more
anonymous: then again, take nothing I say seriously because it's all in theory. You have more experience with this than I do.
anonymous: I can't believe you just said that! You're truly a gracious person Jeremy.
anonymous: not many people would say that
JDay9821: thanks
anonymous: you're welcome. Far be it from me not to give credit when credit is due.

Everything is good, until you really look at it

2005-08-22T17:50:00.000-06:00

Only the naive think everything in life is hunky dory. It constantly amazes me that we can be so grown up in some areas and so immature in other areas. When is comes to business, Im all business. I do very well for myself in a business climate that doesnt really value the young, the minorities, or women. I also just negotiated with both owners of both companies Im trying to work for an agreement that allows me to earn money from both of them at the same time. #1 rule if you are going to be an employee: make yourself scarce. In other words, be more valuable then the next guy.
More time commitment now equals less time commitment in the future, and the ability to pursue even more things. "It is necessary to be slightly under employed if you are to do something significant." - James Watson, 1928 American Geneticist.
Something more then everything. To help you understand this concept better I just asked what attracted Tom to a certain girl. He said everything. I said most people can't handle being told that. And he finished by saying, ...even the things that shouldn't. And my reply to that was, "Something more then everything." That is the true answer, but you cant really put that answer into the words you want. What is that something?
Its the same way with me. I want to accomplish so much. I want to accomplish everything Ive set out to do. Many people say it cant be done, but I keep proving them wrong slowly but surely. Its something more then everything. Its an idea. Its what makes life worth living. Sometimes it comes down to proving the nay-sayers wrong or getting some sweet revenge on ill-placed words. But mostly its about setting ourselves apart. Unique as we are, we want to be more unique until we are so alien we become amazing.
Something more then everything. We want more then everything. We fool ourselves when we think we do. What we are really looking for is a small thing. One little thing that we think all this everything will bring us. Does it all have to come together for us to achieve that one little thing? Its a matter of contentment with what we have and obtaining those little things we want that are big things.
Lastly, I want to recommend the book, The Kindness of Strangers, Penniless Across America. Its about a man who decides to travel across America without a penny to his name relying on the kindness of strangers along the way. The surprising thing isnt so much that he makes it, but just what kind of things ultimately matter in this life. The other surprising thing for those that havent heard it before is how giving the poorest of people can be, and who ultimately helps him along the way and how they help him. Im very tempted to take my own trip by doing just that.
Ill leave you with a quote from the book. "I've never understood what people mean when they say they have to find themselves. We know who we are. The hard part is being that person. It's always so much easier to be somebody else.

It was fun while it lasted...

2005-08-21T17:07:00.000-06:00

Its a shame that things dont work out for the better. I decided today to be friends with a girl I have been dating for awhile. I got my hopes up, but things just arent working out between us. Its hard to believe how something that started out so great in the beginning stalls out in the end. It just wasnt meant to be. I was excited because this was the first girl to come along in a long time that I thought I could be serious with. Apparently, she wasn't ready for the serious relationship she said she was ready for, at least not with me.
I guess Im just a little bit worried that I wont find the girl Im looking for. Everyone says stop looking and thats when they come. Well I gave up looking awhile ago. Im going to play it a little cooler next time and not get my hopes up. Maybe a little more pessimistic, maybe a little more cynical. Its times like these that I wonder if Im capable of having a romantic relationship at all. Then I remember all the great times Ive had in the past, and I become more accepting of the fact that sometimes,... things just werent meant to be.

p.s. a little after this post I talked to her on the phone for about half an hour. I guess I put her on the spot about how she didnt say what her thoughts and feelings were and she said some things she probably didnt want to say. she basically said she just goes with the flow and we were nothing more then friends from the beginning. and you know what, it no longer hurts, it just makes me mad people wont talk openly about this stuff. granted, I probably made a bigger deal out of it then I should have but, I had to know how things could change so drastically from the beginning. Guess our intentions and expectations werent clear and didnt match up at all. its a shame. I wish I could go more with the flow, but in my opinion it doesnt work. Relationships are intentional. Shes of the opinion that relationships go best when things just flow. I cant totally disagree with her, but if you're going to date someone and then you just want to be friends you should at least say something and not just continue letting things flow. It leaves the other person confused and a little hurt when they are expecting a relationship to go one way, and the other person is headed in another. Ok. Im done, but it will take some time to let it go completely. >:-<

Quarter of a Century

2005-08-20T11:53:00.000-06:00

I am finally 25. How do I feel you ask? I feel great, I feel capable, I feel strong, I feel happy, and somewhat contented. Although I probably will never be fully contented Im at peace. I have people that love me and want to see the best for me. Im being myself. If I could just transcend all the daily hassles of life, especially the financial ones, Id be in heaven. But who wouldn't?
"There is nothing better for a man than to eat and drink and tell himself that his labor is good. This also I have seen that it is from the hand of God." This is mentioned more then 5 times in the book of Ecclesiastes in one way or another. It is my guiding word in life. I only write it now because it was the word of the day on Way FM radio. It made me think, "Hey, I'm enjoying the work I do and the life I live. Things may change, but I will be contented with what God has for me in this life" That thought alone makes me happy when times are rough and at their worst.
There are still many things I want to do in this life, but they all come in good time. One of my biggest urges still is to get to China. Another one is to go back to college to be a professional or a professor. ;-) A third is to start my own business. A fourth is to get married and have kids. A fifth is to start a band, and get more into music and film. A sixth is to be a better rock climbing and a skier. A seventh is to complete the Ironman in Hawaii. Seven is a very complete number. I know I talked about completeness before and how unobtainable is seems to be, but accomplishing these seven things, some vague, some not so vague, would make me a very contented person indeed.
The only one Im not really working toward now, that I want to start working toward, is going back to college. I want to be more of an expert in some field, and I know I dont have to go back to college to do that, but I realize, as much as I like sales and as much as I am great at it, I know I dont want to do it for the rest of my life. At least not in the capacity I do it now. Im thinking Im going to stick it out with Mcguyver Painting just because it seems like the best way for me to go through college and still work to make enough money at the same time. My goal is to be back in college by next fall 2006. One year from now Ill be headed to university. Those of you who are my encouragers please keep on me about it.
Tonight we are having a party to celebrate my b-day. Im so excited. The days and the years sure go by fast. My friend Alex is getting married in October. Another one younger then me getting married. haha. I just think its funny how things work out in the end. Especially how we cant predict anything it seems. I love it! Until next time... Via con Dios.

We all gotta follow our muse...

2005-08-18T22:52:00.000-06:00

"Who can say whether the new career will do it or what. It does make a difference, but keep in mind it's the learning part or starting-up part that is rewarding for ENTPs. Once you feel you understand it, it's not engaging anymore and boredom ensues. ENTPs need careers focused on descreet "projects", each one being somehow new and different from the preceeding project. I'm sure acting would be like that - each play and character is a totally new challenge. Tom Hanks might be an ENTP."

I read this in a forum today and it so defines me and why I do the things I do. I have this need to work on projects. Each one being new. Thats probably why being a painting contractor is so great for me. Each job is new. It keeps me hopping and I like it. I dont like the more monotonous aspects of it such as making phone calls but each job has its ups and downs.
Im just happy Im getting closer to that thing that I really want to do, am good at, and benefits other people in a special way. Im thinking of getting into a more advisor, counselor, trainer, teacher type role. We shall see. Anyway, Im off to bed. Tomorrow is my 25th b-day!

My favorite new song...

2005-08-18T16:52:00.000-06:00

Staind - "Right Here"

I know I've been mistaken
But just give me a break and see the changes that I've made
I've got some imperfections
But how can you collect them all and throw them in my face

But you always find a way to keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if you chose to walk away I'd still be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep you right here waiting

I hope you're not intending
To be so condescending it's as much as i can take
and you're so independent
you just refuse to bend so I keep bending till I break

But you always find a way to keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if you chose to walk away I'd still be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep you right here waiting

I've made a commitment
I'm willing to bleed for you
I needed fulfillment
I found what I need in you

Why can't you just forgive me
I don't want to relive all the mistakes I've made along the way
But I always find a way to keep you right here waiting
I always find the words to say to keep you right here waiting

But you always find a way
To keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if I chose to walk away would you be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep me right here waiting

Our new doggie

2005-08-17T20:44:00.000-06:00

hi here is a pic of our new doggie. He is so loveable and cute isn't he? Im so happy I can finally ad pics to blogger. Sweet! Ill add more soon. lata.

p.s. his name is SOLO

Coming to Terms

2005-08-14T18:11:00.000-06:00

Yeah, Im coming to terms with the fact that I am a VERY hard person to get to know. To most people it doesn't matter too much because they only want to get to know me on a certain level. Romantic relationships on the other require that you get to know a person VERY well. Its not easy getting to know someone. It takes time and effort. Things I know but I learn more and more everyday just how hard it can be. Ive said for awhile now that I need a wife who is a mind reader. ;-)
Its not that I dont want people to know me. Its that I have trouble expressing who I am inside. It hurts when the people I want to know and understand me most have trouble getting to know me. I want to help people get to know me better but I dont even know where to begin. And this also worries me because maybe I dont know people as well as I think I know people. Ive never really had an issue with getting to know someone. I feel like I can understand most people, but am I wrong? Am I only touching the surface most of the time? What makes one person feel like they can't know another person? Why do people perceive me as so guarded? Am I really?
These are just questions running through my mind. I dont wanna feel like Im distant from someone simply because they feel like Im distant from them. Yes, I can be in my only little world sometimes... most of the time..., but Im a thinker. Thats who I am. If you cant understand that then maybe you arent meant to know me better. And thats a shame because I want to know you better. hmmm. Help me help you. Thats all I ask.

Disclaimer: This is in no way directed to the reader of this blog. Think of it as a conversation overheard.

Should have called earlier

2005-08-13T20:44:00.000-06:00

You know, sometimes I disappoint myself. This is one of those times. Im a bit unstable right now in my choices, my decisions. I hate being put on the spot to make a quick decision. What Im disappointed about is that this quick decision was preventable if I would have moved faster when I had the chance. Yet I let it go. I didnt take the chance, when I should have taken it. I waited too long and when I was put on the spot I chose no instead of yes, when I wanted to say yes.
Yet things work out in the end... goodnight...

Excitement

2005-08-08T22:15:00.000-06:00

Im entering a rather weird time in my life. Sort of feels like the calm before the storm. In my mind, I envision myself in a large area, its rather dark, like twilight is coming, with glints of light coming from a distance. And Im walking on water. It is silent except for my steps which make the smallest sound. Right then left. Like being born maybe.
Its so hard to explain but I feel like Im barely grasping onto life. Like life is just coming into vision. Things are just starting to form. The edges are barely being made out. Im finally feeling what it means to be alive.
The vistas are opening up and I see the possibilities. The world is wide open to me and I can do anything. Im gaining this quiet sense of satisfaction with life in general. Its beautiful.
Im also becoming more fierce about protecting those special times. Work was overwhelming me for awhile. I realized I needed more balance. I was dead set on going backpacking come hell or highwater. and I did. now that has spilled over to protecting other areas in life that are important to me. I didnt run a marathon I had wanted to run back in June and Im disappointed in myself for that. It was getting my priorities straight that made the difference.
Contentment, wherever Im at. Even though Im constantly searching for something new Im truly content wherever I land. Maybe I dont want to be content. I love everything new. If I didnt have anything new to look forward to, then my life wouldnt be complete.
Ah, that word complete. It seems to be a theme lately. Perhaps I want completeness less then I think. Or what I really want isnt what I need. Or what I think I need isnt that at all. I echo others sentiments.
If you understood this blog, feel free to comment. If not, ask me to explain it to you. I imagine most of you will get it. ;-)

Juror #9

2005-08-04T02:52:00.000-06:00

So I was a juror for a few days this week, and I turned out to be an alternate, which means I got to see the presentation of evidence, testimony, and opening and closing statements, but didnt get to deliberate with the other jurors. They gave the guy a verdict of not guilty. I wish I was there to see it. It was a bit of a let down.
On the flip side, the backpacking trip was awesome. I wish I could have stayed out there even longer. We had our ups and downs, literally..., but all in all I think everyone had a great experience and most want to do it again.
Anyhow, Im not much in the mood to write, but its 3am and I cant sleep. Too many thoughts on the mind about work, about dating, about balancing my social life, about making things work. Too bad no one is on IM to talk to. *sigh*
You know, sometimes you just say to yourself..., "if only this, this, and this happens my life would be complete." ha! I know its so wrong to think that, but thats what Im thinking right now. when did jeremy ever want his life to be complete? lol. sometimes you just gotta pause and enjoy the moment. man, Im trying to do that. really! and heres the but. but, im accomplishment oriented. relationships arent one time deals that you accomplish and then move on among other things. ive treated them that way for too long and hurt a lot of people in the process. now it looks like im setting myself up to be the one that gets hurt. as forrest gump would say, "Thats about all I got to say about that".

A Long Need Vacation

2005-07-20T15:41:00.000-06:00

Next week on Monday is when I leave for a week long backpacking trip in the Lost Creek Wilderness. I haven't looked forward to something this big in a long time. Im soo excited to go. I had a job interview today where the guy asked me to go to this convention in California, and I said Id love to go but Id been planning this backpacking trip for a very long time. Im dropping everything to do this. Nothing will stop me short of death. lol. No cell phones, no bills, no worries. One week in Gods creation soaking in its beauty and forgetting that there is a world out there that is too busy to take a breath. I cant wait, I cant wait, I cant wait. ok Im done. ;-)
So yeah, Im moving on in my career. Taking on the next big thing. This job went above my expectations. Its a new place to excel, a new business owner to learn from, expand myself, and the next step toward owning my own business. I know it may sound counter-intuitive to continue getting jobs when I just want to start a business and create jobs, but at the same time I feel like Im learning from the masters of business. People who went out there and started their own deal. This guys has made his millions and now he wants to make this business succeed. Im excited to help him do that. In return I learn valuable lessons and absorb knowledge that will allow me to more successful when I start my own business.
One day.... ah, those 2 words seem so NEVER. but yes, one day I will start a business, and possibly 2 or 3 or more. and help my friends get their businesses up and running. yes that will be the day. but now I establish myself the best way I know how, and I continue to learn and keep my eyes open.
And as I get older I realize the important things in my life. Part of getting established is deciding on your values and priorities. I think this whole learning process called my "twenties" is a fun time. And I dont care what anyone says, I like my rollarcoaster ride and IM doing what I feel is right. Not what someone else tells me. Ah, its good to be me! Is it good to be you....?

I dont want to grow up

2005-07-15T17:36:00.000-06:00

Its sad but true. I am scared to death of all the work that is ahead for me in my life, and being unsure if I can still be a healthy minded individual if I dont find somethign that at least keeps me interested long term.
Money issues keep creeping up on me too. I hate debt. If I have any advice to anyone, its be fanatical about staying out of debt. I hate the fact that I live month to month, paycheck to paycheck just to make ends meet, and the mountain of debt never seems to go away. bills, bills, bills. I guess the stress is added on by the fact that I have a commision based job that never allows me the ability to stop hammering away at aquiring new business. If I slow up just a bit, I suffer down the road. Its tough. Its teaching me a lesson the hard way.
My living expenses have gone way up and I have no slack to try and leapfrog to the next thing. I didnt get a paycheck for 2 months to start this job, and its showing. I cant catch back up it seems. It hurts. It really is a feeling of helplessness that I have never felt before.
Well to look on the bright side. Im an escape artist and very resourceful. Ill find my way out eventually. Sometimes I wish I would have just stayed at hertz. But then I look back, and I wonder what life would have been like without taking on this job. I now have the courage to start my own business. I dont think I would have if I stayed at hertz. Courage. Its what we all need to survive. Some need it more then others. Courage defines my life more then anything now. Its time to buck up and fight with everything I got. At least thats what it feels like. ;-)
Please feel free to comment on how this time in your life feels and how you are coping, or overcoming...

AHHHHHH!

2005-07-14T21:32:00.000-06:00

Ok. So Ive been riding the rollarcoaster of emotions. Ive started dating again. wow. its crazy. I went on a blind date last night and it went amazingly well. Im so happy. I really do need to be dating again. I think its healthy for me. My parents wanna see me get married one day, and so do I. I cant really do it if all I ever do is work my life away.
So yeah, things are coming to a head about starting my own business. I seeked out a lot of advice, and Im getting some professional advice on Monday. Its hard not to go for it. There are some hurdles I gotta jump, but overall Im excited to be able to own my own business and do my own thing. Everything has been culminating into this. My new mission, or should I say, my culminating mission in life is to be a serial entreprenuer. Its REALLY scary. But everyone has been encouraging and everyone wants to see you succeed and help you anyway they can. At least thats been my experience.
Its hard sleeping these past few weeks. Not only is the heat unbearable, but the thoughts in my mind get to me. I go to sleep and wake up thinking about work. Its crazy. I went for a run today. It was refreshing. This dry heat really gets to my throat. Its like I can never get enough water. Argh.
Ok. I really have nothing to write about. I feel like Im just waiting for the go ahead on the rest of my life. Hmm. Weird feelings. hard to describe. It like forgetting how to write English. I need a shower. goodnight. lol...

Fun Times

2005-07-09T09:52:00.000-06:00

You know what? I really do like the life of a construction manager. Sure it has its headaches, but it can be downright fun at times, and seeing the finished product gives you a lot of pride in your work and a sense of accomplishment.
Ive been talking with my painters alot about starting a business. Its an exciting idea. Just the fact that Im getting alot of referal work, and surviving almost exclusively on it gives me the confidence I need to go out there and do it. I have my doubts. I feel like work is my life now, but its an ok life. It seems to fit my personality. Like I said in a previous blog, Im very acheivement oriented. Its sure better then sitting in an office all day long.
At the same time, Im not as aggressive as when I started out. Ive learned a few lessons, and I remind myself that sometimes I push too hard. The fact of the matter is that I chose to work those Saturdays that I complain about. And now Im choosing not to work my butt off. Im learning to let things flow more naturally. I really couldnt believe how deadline-oriented I had become. One thing I always remind myself about is that you become your work. I work up this morning thinking how I was going to plan my day today and get setup for monday. Isnt that sad, that my first waking thought is about work?
Its also about ethics. As a businessman, I have many options to be unethical. It definitely puts you through the fire. Like one question I have... Should I do jobs on the side so that the company doesn't profit from them? Here is a further question. Does it matter where I sourced that lead from? Should the company be entitled for work that I do for a friend? Im not only wrestling with ethical issues on my side of the fence, Im wrestling with ethical issues from the company. I did a job for Toms friend, and I could have saved him a lot more money if I didnt go through the company to do it, contract-wise, but would that have been the right thing to do? This was a lead sourced outside of company channels. Why should they profit from it? Also, they make me pay for all my own equipment. Shouldnt I be entitled to use it the way I see fit?
I just dont know. Like I said it puts me through the fire, and tests what Im made of. Like I said, I probably need to start my own business. There is more, but Ill leave it at that. I really need to talk to someone about all this, and I will. As always, WSS.

Unexpected Things

2005-07-05T06:54:00.000-06:00

Oh man, we had a great Independence Day party. Its early the next day and Im trying hard to wake up and go to work. I was up till at least 4am last night. Or should I say this morning. Thats 2 whole hours of sleep. Gotta love it.
Yesterday was great. I celebrated my independence by climbing two routes up Dome rock in Boulder Canyon. I bought new climbing shoes and they work great. They are 5.10 Stealth C4's. I went with Tim, Lisa, and Andre. I guess the unexpected things started to happen when we couldnt climb the original rock face that we had wanted because high water kept us from being able to cross the stream to get to it. So we found this other place and Tim was estatic the whole time because he was like I never knew this existed. This is a great route. Etc. etc. etc...
So yeah, we got back, and I went to pick up Beau and Brad. Those guys are great. Its a shame they are leaving to go to Austin. Maybe we will visit them sometime. Then I got back to the party and people started to arrive. I had small talk with just about everyone. We ate good food, we laughed, we had a great time. I was a bit disappointed because Kiersten and Melissa, two good friends of ours, left without saying goodbye to me. They didnt really search hard enough cause I was just in my bedroom with Nikki showing her some pictures and I came out and they were gone. I guess they were just in a hurry to leave cause they had something to do the next day.
Anyhow, we watched the fireworks from our roof. That was a blast. Then the unexpected things started to happen. I shared my jacket with Nikki cause we were both a little chilly cause of the wind. After the fireworks were over we ended up staying on the roof after everyone else went down and talked for like 2 hours. After that we started just cuddling with each other wanting to go to bed. It was kinda weird cause I never would have imagined having romantic feelings for this girl, but I decided I would just go with the flow. So it opened up some things that I dont know what to do with now, but suffice it to say, a lot of unexpected good with likely come out of it. Im being intentionally vague so dont expect to understand what Im talking about. I guess I just needed to write it to get it off my chest.
So yeah, we shall see. I had a lot of fun, and now its back to the daily grind. Man, I wish I would have taken a half day today or something. Im hurting pretty bad. Im probably going to do my thing this morning, get my address on my drivers license changed, and come home and take a nap.
Carpe Diem!

The 4th is upon us

2005-07-03T22:11:00.000-06:00

Ahhh ...Independence. Freedom... Choice... Thats what this country is all about. Thats what it was built on. I hate people telling me what to do. Guess thats why I am where I am right now. Practically boss of my own company. New Home Owner. Single and Loving it. haha. No one tells me what to do.
...a man's worst difficulties begin when he is able to do as he likes.
- Thomas Henry Huxley
"Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility." -Sigmund Freud
"Those who desire to give up freedom in order to gain security, will not have, nor do they deserve, either one." -Benjamin Franklin
Ain't it the truth. Its scary being able to do as I like. The choices are endless, and Im responsible for all the consequences. A true sign of a "grown-up" is someone who can handle consequences. I see too many people who cant. But lets look on the bright side.
"The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage." -Thucydides
"The cost of freedom is always high, but Americans have always paid it. And one path we shall never choose, and that is the path of surrender, or submission." -John Fitzgerald Kennedy
So lets remember on this Independence Day exactly what we are proclaiming from the beginning. That we will not allow tyranny to keep from us that which we hold dear. That no man on any throne can take away the God-given rights we have secured to be our treasure.
I hope everyone who reads this takes time to think about why they are free and what a gift it is. And as Patrick henry would say, "I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!"
Thank you.

What I've Learned....

2005-06-29T21:22:00.000-06:00

...from being a painting contractor.
1. There is always a way. Its our company motto but its good news for life. If you want something bad enough you can get it. There's always a way. There have been some tough spots Ive been in and some tough decisions had to be made but I always figured it out in the end.
2. Don't be afraid to ask for help. I couldn't make a way without help. My painters help me, the owners help me, I help my painters. Everyone helps each other. Anyone who knows how hard it is to move an upright 32 foot ladder knows that sometimes its best to ask for help.
3. The sun shines through the clouds. This has a double meaning. One, you can still get sunburnt even with a cloudy sky. But more importantly, things turn out alright in the end. You can always find the good in something.
4. What goes around comes around. Integrity has its price, but it sure buys a lot. I just did a rather small interior job for someone and things didnt go so well. We were working really late to try to finish the job on a Saturday and we made this guy like 2 or 3 hours late to a party he was going to. Anyhow, he goes to this party and give my business card to a guy who remodels homes, and one of his customers needs a paint job. Bingo! I booked a HUGE job out of it! Even though I didnt make any money on the smaller job, Im going to make a LOT on the bigger job. It all comes out in the end.
5. Sometimes you try really hard, and it doesn't come out Yeah, its a bit contradictory, but you arent a superhero, and no one is perfect. I guess I should rename this one "mistakes happen". But I wont. Mistakes happen all the time. If customers knew how many mistakes we made and what they were they would never hire us. Our mistakes are many, but we get the job done, fix what we can, make the customer the happiest we can, and move on.
6. Selling ability takes you far I dont care who you are, you can learn to sell, and you could do it in your own way. Im the #1 sales person in Denver right now for my company. How do I do it? I have no clue. It mainly comes down to competition and challenge. Nobody really gives a damn if Im #1 or not. A customer just cares that you can get the job done right at a reasonable price. Most people arent willing to pay for quality despite what they say. Some of them wouldnt know quality if it hit them. ha. Those people actually like Wal-Mart. enough said ;-)
7. You make your own choices Now more then ever I realize I have choices to make everyday. Some are big, some are small. Most choices dont change much even though we think they do. As many wise people have said, its better to make a decision then none at all. And no decision is still a decision. You choose your own destiny in life. You're in control. Use that power. Dont make a no decision. Decide what you want to do with your life cause its yours. Sorry for the double negative.
Ill stop now cause seven seems like a good round number....even though it isnt. Im off to watch The Aviator. If its not good Im going to bed. haha.
Rest well all you cool cats....

Complimenting Commenter

2005-06-26T20:13:00.000-06:00

I knew there was a reason I endlessly searched the blog sites. I would come upon one worth talking amount, one worth adding to my list, one that would provide continual entertainment or if not entertainment, then insight, and if not insight then at least something interesting to read every once in awhile. Go now or forever hold your pee. ;-) http://www.complimenter.blogspot.com/

Wanting to give up...

2005-06-25T21:57:00.000-06:00

I just put in a 14 hour day. I dont think I can take much more of this. The sad thing is I like it a lot but its a bit rough. I dont know if its worth it all. If I can make the same amount of money elsewhere with less hours and less stress shouldnt I do it? Ill be straight forward with you all. In the next year or two I will be doing one of four things. Going to school to be a teacher, or to be an architect. Going into the military to fly helicopters, or going to China and eventually getting my PhD in Chinese history or something. Feel free to make your comments.
Even though Im good at sales I dont forsee me doing it for much longer. Ive gone far enough to realize that if Im going to do business it has to be MY business. Only then will I care enough about it to stick the hardships out. I need a job that has to do something with other then the bottom line. Teach, transport, design, learn. I dont really care much about money and I dont want profit to be engrained in me. I dont think any of you that read this could understand cause all of you have jobs outside of business or indirectly related to it. All I do IS business.
Enough of my gripes. Here is something positive. A guy that we did an interior job for referred me to a friend who booked with us. A lot of things had gone wrong on this job and I asked him why he referred me cause I was surprised. He said, "Even though a lot of things went wrong, Jeremy always did the right thing" I appreciated his comment. I like doing the right thing, even though it hurts at times. Its so easy for me to do the right thing for other people, why cant I do the right thing for myself? ..................

Blog-Tacular

2005-06-14T20:09:00.000-06:00

Well I figured I should keep blogging away considering Im on a role.
Update:
1. The 'rents are coming in this weekend. I cant wait. Im excited to show my parents my new house. My dad said it was a wise thing to do. Im happy to hear that. He told me he was 29 when he bought the house they live in now. Im almost 25 and I think I was crazy insane to buy a house at this age with my proclivities. yeah go look THAT up in the dictionary.
2. I am also running a marathon this weekend. ESTES PARK MARATHON
3. We just bought $200 of groceries. Gosh, living is expensive. Maybe its just our living thats expensive. We have a kid to feed ya know. we named him jason. well, he actually came with that name. anyhow... :-4. Speaking of expenses, growing up is scary as hell. But the sooner you do it, the better. Mortgage payments may mean death, but its nice to live in a place rent free 30 years down the line and not have to worry so much anymore.
5. I dont know if I can deal with the commision jobs anymore. Thats what makes things even scarier. Its all me. Not only do I have my own life in my hands I have all my employees lives in mine. Indirectly of course, but they are living paycheck to paycheck just like me. The checks came in late this week cause the mail forwarding system is slow. (sidenote: if you forward your mail expect it to take at least 3 days extra for it to get to you)
So my one painter couldnt make his insurance payment that was due, therefore he couldnt drive his van. (Well he could, but he already got busted once for driving without insurance) Therefore, he couldnt get all the supplies we needed including the ladders to the job site. Fun times.
And Ive run out of jobs for my guys to do. Which means they dont get a paycheck, in fact it means I dont get a paycheck either. Its kinda like getting laid off except in my case Im still working and not getting paid. At least not yet.

In conclusion, Im just not sure if I have what it takes. But I sure am developing it. That ability to overcome your own fears and stick with it and make things happen despite all costs, overcoming laziness and procrastination.
But like I said I have my proclivities and I am constantly tempted to break free. Its a vicious cycle.
Time to try and get away from everything to be alone with myself for just a bit. God knows I need it.

Im passing it around, a Library vacation!

2005-06-14T09:51:00.000-06:00

I havent exactly found anything out. But you know, its a personal journey anyhow. I can only give you encouragement to not give up. I found this interesting website that you should read. In it the guy explains how a Library Vacation can help you to discover what you want to do with your life. The basic concept is that the library has lots of info. about many different industries. You just let your interests take you where they may lead. Once you find those things you dive deeper into them until..., and I quote, "The only rule is that you must drive your interest until it dies, or until it gets you to your destination." - Nick Corcodilos
Its a good idea that I am actually to DO. Ive been meaning to get back to the library to read an old article of Time anyhow. Until next time, adieu...

Convinced and Convicted.

2005-06-13T01:46:00.000-06:00

two very similar words. This is todays sermon. Ephesians 4. The body of Christ, how we are all part. Each has his own fuction. Why do some of us try to do it all? Why dont we just find our niche and stick with it? How do some find it easy, and others hard? I dont know.
What I do know is that I try the best I can to do what I can. Ultimately, I know my gifts. I just gotta use them. I know my passion, so why do I run away from it? Why is it so hard to give up one think for another, yet its so easy to stay uncommited and lose out on both? What path am I following? How did I end up here? Did I just catch the next gust of wind that came by? When this one dies out, do I move on to the next or am I left stranded? The questions I ask myself that you know nothing about. Yet can gather something of their existence and what they mean.
I try yet if its not my place, why do I strive so hard to make it that way? Am I really an escapist or just someone that has an absolute need to be where they need and want to be? Yes I wrote had instead of has in that previous sentence. Does that say anything? Have I lost my absolute need? Have I settled? Can I go back? Why are these dreams being reawakened? ha, does that make sense?
Why now, why all at once? What is God trying to tell me? Is it anything? Has it been there all along and I havent been listening, or is it new? Blessing or curse, I dont know. But its late and I need rest. So Goodnight...

It might be chronic

2005-06-11T20:22:00.000-06:00

Yes my condition that never allows me to stick with anything. Im an escapist. I like to put myself into situations so I can escape them. I dont know if thats entirely correct but its close. At least close to what I think I do. Its the perfectionist and the thrill junkie in me both working toward making me completely unstable.
Its like Ive tasted this, there has to be more. So I move onto the next thing, and then the next. Hell, its a great ride, but man will I ever find what Im searching for. Am I searching for nothing, or is there SOMETHING out there. Am I even searching at all for anything or am I just wandering and restless?
Do you ever feel like you arent living your life? Like its living it for you? Or you arent being yourself? I know we all have, but its mostly temporary. Im talking permanent. Permanent as in you changed your whole life because of other people. Became someone you originally werent because it wasnt acceptable or right or best to be who you were. Have we all changed like this or am I alone?
Ive always been drastic in my actions. Do I have a need to be? Different? Yes. But... sometimes I feel Im just wrestling with myself. I cant tell.
Which leads me to my dreams and thoughts when I was young. For most of my life I wanted to join the military. Ive thought about it off and on, but just the fact that Im still thinking about means its something I should do so I dont regret it. Ahhh. Regrets. Such a harsh word. Such harsh things. All encompassing they are. I dont wanna live with them and you probably dont either I imagine. Who does? Regrets=not following what we believe is true and right at the time. Ah, I wanna scream out loud. Frustrating this thing called life. Ecclesiastes 8:15

Local Band the Fray

2005-06-09T21:54:00.000-06:00

You gotta check this guys out. http://www.thefray.net Cable Car is such a good song. Its so rhythmic and addictive. Im getting more and more in the mood to create music. I think its my fiddle class causing that, which by the way is going well. Im learning some little diddies.
Fathers Day is coming up. Its one of those weird holidays very similar to the b-days people dont want you celebrating. Mothers Day is all special with flowers and everything but Fathers Day is never big. Dad gets the grill, the golf clubs, the tie, etc. Its like a 2nd b-day for Fathers.
So Ive bought a house, guess the next step is to get married and have kids. ha! I was talking to a friend last night about which is more grown-up, buying a house or getting married. She thought buying a house was more grown up. I guess its because of all the people we know who are getting married. Guess in our society the order should go as follows: Get married, buy a house, have kids. What do you think?

Sometimes you just feel like a...

2005-06-07T08:10:00.000-06:00

I was thinking yesterday that sometimes I just feel like a zombie. Maybe its the lack or sleep or nutrition, but something tells me it could be something else. I feel some sort of disengagement from what Im doing sometimes. Call it day dreaming. Call it what you will, but it scares me sometimes. I wanna connect to what Im doing but sometimes it feels so hard. Im having trouble explaining what I mean.
I guess Im running myself too hard and I just need some rest. Im letting myself be pulled in too many different directions that I dont even feel like I have time for myself. Maybe Ive officially joined the rat race. Going after the American dream of a beautiful wife, 2.5 kids, a nice house, and a retreiver that plays in the back yard.
I yearn for accomplishment but what does that mean? What am I trying to accomplish? Does it all spring from envy of my fellow man, or is it more internal? Or do I just not know what Im talking about? As Always, WSS.

We're good to go

2005-06-04T09:27:00.000-06:00

So Im finally getting settled in the new house. We now have internet! Yeah! Its great. Now I can do business stuff again. You dont know how dependent on the internet you are until you dont have it. You also dont know how dependent we are on the weather till your job depends on whether it rains or shines.
Anyhow, I cant complain. My life is full, sometimes a bit too full of things that keep me busy. Im having fun, but Im starting to feel too wrapped up in my job. Im here Saturday morning typing on my blog, but also doing payroll stuff. If it wasnt raining Id be out helping my painters get a job done. *sigh* such is life.
I NEED to go camping soon. Or just get out for a weekend. My social life has been slacking. I need to get out more. I missed my friends grad party more or less because of work. So much to do, so little time.
Ok. enough ranting. blah. i hate it...

It was the best of times, it was the...

2005-05-30T12:31:00.000-06:00

This is the last time Ill be posting from the Monaco place. My room is quite empty and Im filling up a new room quite nicely. I got a futon, a file cabinet, a desk, a nice chair, and a dresser all for 50 bucks. Yard Sales are Gods fortune to me. We are getting everything for the new house on the cheap. I bought a bathroom set with rugs and a shower curtain for like 10 bucks. Im getting a couch for 30 and a lawnmower for 50. We are getting another couch and some chairs from one of Toms friends including some more beds. The last thing we really need is a dryer, a kitchen table, and possibly a new fridge.
Im so excited. We are refinishing a hardwood floor that the old owner glued linoleum over. Gosh not too smart. Plus previous to that it had carpet on it. In fact, nearly the entire upstairs has hardwood floors that are carpeted over. Gotta love that.
Business is going well. Hectic as always and stressful trying to get more business but overall its going great.
Tom is moving back to PA. It took him 2 days to decide. Read his blog. So it will be just us 3 merry men living at the new place. Tom is trying to convicne his friend Jason H. to move out. We shall see. These are exciting times.
I guess its kinda weird that Im so focused on what Im doing now that Im not worrying about what career I should be following or if I should go back to college. Im happy and things seem to be working out. Im giving myself a year in this job, and it all depends on how fantastic the summer is and how well I can survive the winter. WSS=We shall see!
My marathon is June 18th. Wish me luck. Fiddle classes are going well although I missed one week. My parents are coming to visit that same weekend. Im excited. Everyone needs to come out and visit either this summer or winter. We have extra beds and everything. Mi casa es su casa!
Anyhow, gotta run, literally, and get some more moving stuff done today. Peace out!

Slacking

2005-05-17T10:06:00.000-06:00

Yes Im slacking in the writing department. Ive been meaning to write on here for awhile but just havent for whatever reason. Jason and Tom are here now. In fact Tom is standing right beside me right now. They arrived early Sunday morning and woke me up at 6am. Tom met them somewhere near the Kansas-Colorado border.
So Sunday I took the top off the Jeep and drove up Loveland Pass (which still has snow) and Guenella Pass (where we saw a couple bighorn sheep). We were hot, we were cold, we were laughing, we were talking. yeah. we should have went camping but we didnt plan on it. We found a cool spot up Guenella Pass we will probably go back to.
Work has had its ups and downs. Im doing well for the most part. And now Tom is here to help me. One of the managers quit so Im in the process of taking over her territory which borders mine. I feel a bit stretched out and overly pressured at times, but overall I cant complain. I dont have to sit in no dumb office waiting for the clock to strike a certain time before I leave. I make my own schedule. I pretty much do as I please. It comes with tradeoffs (i.e. Im making phone calls 5-8pm when I wanna just eat dinner and watch a movie or hang out or something), but once again it has its perks. Like, its 10:15am and Im typing on my blog. I know a few people who can do that at work, but I wont mention any names. ;-)
Ive come to terms with myself knowing that I will probably never be 100% satisfied with any job, but if I can be 80-90% satisfied then its all ok.
Anyhow, Memorial Day and Toms b-day is almost here, and that means a lot of partying. I cant wait. Till then I bid u adieu...

The Newness

2005-04-28T20:29:00.000-06:00

I have just written two new songs pretty much in the same day. Im so happy. I havent written a new song in awhile and now 2!. One is really great and the other one is good but needs some work I think. I cant wait for Jason to get out an for him to get the recording studio up and running. I also cant wait for Tom to buy a drumset. He pinky sweared with me he would get one, but I dont know if he really wants to spend the money on it right now. I really hope to get a great band going soon.
Not much other news execpt that its snowing again. I cant believe it. This is putting me so far behind schedule. I hate it. I just gotta deal I guess. Well I gotta get going. Talk to ya laters...

End of an Era

2005-04-27T08:05:00.000-06:00

This time marks the end of an era. It all started when I finished writing in my journal this past week. It is my 5th journal over ten years and now I will start on my sixth. Finishing the last page in my journal always seems to uncanningly coincide with a change in pace or a change in place. I finished my 4th journal when I got out here. I finished my third when I graduated college. I finished my 2nd when I moved into an apartment for the first time. I finished my first when I graduated high school.
This time Im a business professional looking to buy a house. I have a great friend moving out here to stay, and Im in a job I plan on keeping for more then a year. Turning 25 is truly the time we seem to be turning ourselves into adults.
Some things have changed, some haven't. I still hate wal-mart (that pit of hell). I was there the other day and vowed never to return again when I watched an ugly lady with 15 items go through the 10 items or less line in front of me! Argh. Im taking up fiddle lessons next week. And for the perhaps the first time in my life Im taking responsibility for myself and others on a more or less fulltime basis. Being a manager of people is the best of times and the worst of times but overall I see my growth. I see my confidence in my abilities and I know my talents are best used in circumstances such as this.
Something else has changed. My travel bug has diminished. I have other more pressing goals. I see it returning soon nontheless. I have more focus now then ever. My one minded goal is to succeed in this business like no other. I still love the mountains dearly but they have lost their alure like all things material. Im excited to spend time there this summer to be free, but they arent an all consuming purpose like last summer.
Im still cocky as hell, ever unsatisfied with myself, and cheap. At least thats what Tom calls it. I tend to call it frugal. All in all though Im still that same old G. ;-) Peace out!

Speaking of Bono...

2005-04-21T06:58:00.000-06:00

I got to go to a U2 concert last night at the Pepsi Center. It was so great. My friend got tickets and asked me to go for free. How can u pass that up? They played a lot of my favorites including Its a Beautiful Day. Cant let it get away. ;-)
I started painting this week. So far so good. Rain has a set us back a bit but not much. I kinda planned for it. This is more responsibility Ive ever had I believe. Hertz gave a me a lot of responsibility but in all reality Im way more responsible for things in this job. Its all me. If I dont make it happen no one else will.
Its sunny right now and I cant wait till I get a chance to head to the mountains. I have one week planned to take off and go on an extended hiking/camping trip in the mountains in July. I cant wait. I need some precludes.
Two months from now is my marathon. It is soo hard to fit training into my schedule right now and I hate it. This is my third day not running and for the most part Ive been training everyday. I need to get back on the horse by tomorrow for sure.
Lastly, Im taking a fiddle class starting in May. Ill let you know how that goes. Have fun!